I fucking hate my life

This is what Post traumatic stress disorder, plus OCD, plus self harm, plus loving someone does to an insane person....
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Created by MagicalMayhem on Saturday, June 26, 2010

I'll talk with you,
Then I'll say something wrong.
We'll just laugh it off,
But the feeling lasts so long.

I love you so much,
So why do I screw up?
It kills me inside,
I want to fucking die.

I say I have to go,
Off to shower or some other lie.
Instead I grab my razor,
And slice up my thigh.

This stress is too much,
Always trying to be perfect for you.
Making sure every fold is even,
Dusting everything off past my curfew.

I hate being OCD,
especially with you in the mix.
Everything has to be perfect,
Everything has to be fixed.

You make me feel alive,
Then make me feel like shit.
Though its not even your fault,
You don't even know you're doing it.

All I seem to do,
Is sit in my room and cry.
I hate living this fucking life,
Shit, that corner isn't aligned.

I stop everything I'm doing,
To make sure things are in their place.
Though I'll never have one in your heart,
I'm just a friend to replace.

I'm such a good actress,
I look like I'm always have a great time,
But inside I'm so miserable,
I fucking hate my life.

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