I sit here every night wondering if its worth the fight.
Is there anything left to gain wading through all this pain.
In the beginning it was bliss every time we’d hug or kiss.
Now all I wanna do is cry sometimes even wanna die.
I tried to change to make you stay I guess it don’t work that way.
I miss how things used to be back when you meant the world to me
No matter what I said you took it wrong but my love for you stayed strong.
I tried my best to make you happy but your attitude started getting crappy.
Everything I did was wrong in your eyes then you believed everyone’s lies.
Instead of talking to me about it first you just went and believed the worst.
I know I’m not perfect sometimes bad tho I never wanted to make you sad.
When we would fight I would yell ive even told you to go to hell
I don’t know why when I’m angry and scream I say things that I don’t mean.
Relationships aren’t easy unless both people provide nobody deserves a free ride.
I usually felt like you didn’t care so my feelings and thoughts I didn’t share.
After a while I started to crave the stuff I wanted but you never gave.
I tried to be faithful and keep true all the promises I made to you.
I guess I failed with that quest even tho I tried my best.
I never meant to hurt you girl you’re my oyster, my lobster, my pearl.
After a while I started going away even tho you would beg me to stay.
I couldn’t deal with all the crap sometimes I thought about not coming back.
But I always returned to be with you cause I loved you and to this day still do.
Then one day you said you were splitting I was scared and hoped you were kidding.
No matter what I never ran away even with all the problems I begged you to stay.
Even tho my love for you is great it feels like apart was always our fate.
When you left I was confused and scared I felt like you never cared.
Then when you were gone and I was alone that’s when my heart started to moan.
Then my heart started to crack cause you would leave and then come back.
Now its almost torn in two but still contains the love I felt for you.
Then you asked if we could be a couple once more however my heart is tender and sore.
I asked you to be patient and give me time to think its hard when you’ve been pushed to the brink.
The hate and anger and pain I feel will take quite a while to heal.
I’m not sure what’s for the best can my love for you survive this test.
If it doesn’t work on this last try will the love I have for you totally die.
I’m really scared to start a new if you were me what would you do
I’m not a big fan of the unknown but I also don’t want to be alone.
I still love you more than you would guess my soul still shudders from your caress.
So in closing know that I love you dear but its hard to decide because of the fear.