Are You A Stepford Wife?

Take the Are You A Stepford Wife? quiz.

Your husband goes out with the guys for the night, what do you do with yourself?

Sit at home and read a book or watch a DVD you have been meaning to get around to. Spend time with the one you truly love: your favorite multi setting shower head. Call up the UPS man, the cable guy, and the butcher. Call up your girlfriends and get together to gossip about celebrities. Surf personals website to look for a more successful man. Clean up the house and make him a nice snack he can have when he gets home. Go shopping without knowing what you need to buy.

A tough day at work for you means...

Multitasking at the office, boardroom meetings with the CFO, firing a employee with seniority and a family of three to support. Preparing a 7 course meal involving your hubby's favorite dish with just enough time to shower and get in a sexy short outfit. Going through your husband's drawers trying to find items he won't miss, which you then slap on Ebay. Cruising the neighbor's pool boy. Shopping with your girlfriends and getting your nails done. Getting up to throw away the empty bucket of KFC. Watching Discovery channel and wikipedia-ing words you just learned.

The best way to greet your husband at the end of his workday is...

Set a pail of water over the front door so he gets punk'd the moment he walks in. Yell "THAT YOU!?" from three rooms away. Put the frozen Hungry Man TV Dinner (still frozen) on the counter and leave the house for a weekend on the Serengeti plains Hang out with your girlfriends and get raunchy and loud at the local Chippendales. Call him on the cell to tell him you will be home late, and ask him to order out and pick up from the local Chinese takeout. Clean up the oily handprints from your dress Take a bath, put on a sexy outfit, and stand at the door with his slippers, drink, and waiting with stars in your eyes

What do you do to get the two of you "in the mood?"

"Who cares what he wants, I have my needs!" "Whatever he wants is what I want!" "Whatever I want is what we want." Hang out until only informercials are on the TV, then declare it's too late to do anything: "tomorrow's another day!" Get his best friend to come over before he gets home, and have your way with that friend. Hike in the woods, visit Home Depot, tune your engine, and reward yourself with having spent the day wisely. Look at his bank statement and daydream.

When making decisions that affect the both of you...

You are practical, and therefore save time by taking the first step and making the decision before consulting him. "I have too much on my plate, he can go ahead and make the decisions, and I can change them later." You decide the part that affects you, and he can modify that part that affects him. You always provide backup measures that will give you free time so you can still do what you need to do. You make the decision based on your best interests. He knows what's best for us.

You catch your hubbie eyeballing another woman when you are both walking through the mall. You say to yourself:

He's a man, it's normal to have a healthy appetite. I'm too busy eyeballing another woman (or man) myself. I need a pretzel. I could be at home right now, who knows what service men will be at my doorstep today? I'll pretend I didn't see it, there's bigger fish to fry. He'll get his later. Ooo look! Barnes and Noble is having a sale! "I'd kill for those pair of sandals she's wearing, lemme ask where she got it!"

An ideal vacation spot for you is....

A place I can be alone, wind down and get pampered. Anywhere where my free travel miles will accumulate nicely. Anywhere where there are hot men all around basking in the sun. A day getting a facial, nails, waxing, hair, skin treatment, and pedicure done. Running to and back from the kitchen, refreshing my husband and his friends' drinks. A place where you can speak, be understood, and use his ATM card. The couch.

A beautiful way to wake up in the morning is...

After he has gone off to work. Find out the name of the man lying next to you. 3 more hours of sleep in addition to your usual 10. He serves you breakfast in bed. You serve him in bed, then serve him breakfast in bed, then thank him for giving you the opportunity to serve him. Bright and bushy tail and early in for work. The day after his funeral, caused by a mysterious accident.

"To Serve Man...."

"...is a social construct. Patriarchy obliterated herstory in revisionism." "yeah right, man is here to serve me." "is the motto of www.stepfordwives.org" "...is not a cookbook, it's a pleasure!" "...is a cookbook! Don't get on that spaceship!!!" "I'll have two please!" "...is an investment with rock solid returns."

After pleasuring your husband you...

say, "GET OFF ME!" wake up and thank heavens it's a dream say, "meet you back here in another year." consider it another notch in your belt for getting better at what you do. cross your fingers and hope your performance will result in a nice dinner out later that day. ask him to get you a snack from the kitchen. You are starved! Look at him with stars in your eyes and thank him gratefully.

You have a disagreement with your husband in the supermarket, you...

smile and tell him he's right, but pop an expensive item in the cart so you're even. say, "whatever. just shut up already!" whip out syllogistic squares and pie charts, obliterating his argument with cold hard logic and breaking his spirit. decide to do supermarket chores alone from now on. 1) I always go to the supermarket alone 2) I never disagree with my husband. 3)My husband is always right. make eye contact with the bag boy to punish him pout and sulk until he lets you have your way and swears you were right all along.

A Stepford Wife is

satire that poked fun at both chauvinists and feminists. hard work. a loser. I don't know. a duty that I enjoy fulfilling. someone who doesn't have to work and have all her needs taken care of. someone who gets to stay at home when the husband is not around.

If you had a son and daughter, in what order would you take advice from your family?

yeah right. They listen to me because I have more experience and I gave them life. shut up and eat your Spam, I still have to take off these hair curlers. "whatever, just go outside and play and be home by dinner, mommy has things to take care of." My husband, then my son, and then my daughter. The men of the house are more level headed anyway. "it depends who is on the will and what each is entitled to." "I am guided by and listen only to my inner voice." "I listen to my girlfriends. They know my needs."

In public, I feel a wife like myself should be dressed....

like a hottie to attract maximum attention. in whatever i was wearing when I was at home. in designer brand names to impress comfortably but stylishly to show that I'm aware of current fashion, but also to denote taste. modestly, but girly so men will hold doors for me but not treat me as a sex object. in whatever I have time to put on when I walk out the door. in comfortable but expensive clothing.

at home in private, I dress...

In tight sexy outfits to please my husband in tight sexy outfits with the shades drawn in a mu mu down, i need to relax and wind down. whatever is clean and has the correct day stitched on it. down when the husband is not around, and up depending on how close it is to his payday. skin creams, mud packs, celery patches, and a cocktail in hand.

Spoiling myself means...

pursuing my interests and making strides within it. a different face every day of the week. having women more beautiful than myself attend to my needs. pleasing my husband even when I don't have to. taking a personal day from the office. having extra food delivered to the front door step. having a lover who can make my husband's "accident" look like one.

Success is....

A husband who is proud of me and feels lucky to have me as a wife. getting half once the thrill is gone. the corner office. personal achievement. getting pampered and being the envy of my girlfriends. meeting the new single guy who just moved in down the block. getting to watch all the soaps for the day.

I feel ____________ compared to my husband.

like I'm a catch like an airhead superior in intellect like a sloth I'm way ahead of the game I am way more attractive I'm better off single

Select a famous person / celebrity you admire...

Andy Dick Oprah Elizabeth Taylor Cindy McCain Paris Hilton Anna Nicole Megan McCormick

QuizillaImagine it. Create it. Share it.

Your husband goes out with the guys for the night, what do you do with yourself?

A tough day at work for you means...

The best way to greet your husband at the end of his workday is...

What do you do to get the two of you "in the mood?"

When making decisions that affect the both of you...

You catch your hubbie eyeballing another woman when you are both walking through the mall. You say to yourself:

An ideal vacation spot for you is....

A beautiful way to wake up in the morning is...

"To Serve Man...."

After pleasuring your husband you...

You have a disagreement with your husband in the supermarket, you...

A Stepford Wife is

If you had a son and daughter, in what order would you take advice from your family?

In public, I feel a wife like myself should be dressed....

at home in private, I dress...

Spoiling myself means...

Success is....

I feel ____________ compared to my husband.

Select a famous person / celebrity you admire...

Link:

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QuizillaImagine it. Create it. Share it.

Are You A Stepford Wife?

Your husband goes out with the guys for the night, what do you do with yourself?

A tough day at work for you means...

The best way to greet your husband at the end of his workday is...

What do you do to get the two of you "in the mood?"

When making decisions that affect the both of you...

You catch your hubbie eyeballing another woman when you are both walking through the mall. You say to yourself:

An ideal vacation spot for you is....

A beautiful way to wake up in the morning is...

"To Serve Man...."

After pleasuring your husband you...

You have a disagreement with your husband in the supermarket, you...

A Stepford Wife is

If you had a son and daughter, in what order would you take advice from your family?

In public, I feel a wife like myself should be dressed....

at home in private, I dress...

Spoiling myself means...

Success is....

I feel ____________ compared to my husband.

Select a famous person / celebrity you admire...

Link:

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About this Quiz

Got An Idea? Get Started!

NEW TO QUIZILLA?

Nickelodeon Kids and Family Websites

More Nick