All that glitters is not gold
I was sitting in my dark room crying once again. My heart was beating faster than ever and my hands were shaking like leaves in the wind. I was covered in cold sweat and I couldn't breath properly.
It hurted like a hell again.
Usually so warm and soft rug under me didn't felt so soft anymore. It felt really cold and gruffy. Everything that touched my skin felt painfull, even my clothes. My skin was covered with bruises, cuts, chafes and dry blood.
I really needed to get some sleep. But I didn't want to go to bed without taking a shower, but I knew that the shower would feel more painful than ever. I tried to get up from the floor and I managed to do it really slowely. Every move I made was killing me. This time I was sure that
one of my ribbs had broken. I had heard the snap when he threw me against the wall.
I leaned against the cold walls when I walked into my bathroom. Luckily I had one in my room or else I don't know if I would be alive anymore. It had a lock on it so I could hide there untill he would calmdown.
And when I say he I mean my stepfather Roger. He is something that words can't describe strongly enough. He has a problem with alcohol and he is very violent torwards me. But when he is around my mother he acts like a sweet angel. He's sort of like a maniac.
My mother isn't home that much. She's always working. Either she is in the office or on some business trip. And when she is home she spends all her time with Roger. Also when she is home I can breathe properly and I don't constantly have to look behind my back.
My mother don't believe anything bad about Roger. Roger is like an angel to her. Even though I always look like I've been living in hell, she don't suspect anything. Not even when she saw him coming out of my room one day and I was bleeding. She just tought that Roger had come to my room to see if I was okey.
While I was in shower I heard my mother come home from the office. Luckily she came back, now I could sleep the whole night without worries. The water felt stingy against my skin but I had to suck the pain in. I didn't want to be covered in blood all the time.
" Amelia? Are you home?" I heard my mother yelling me from the livingroom. I came out from the shower and I wrapped a bathrobe around my body and a towel around my head. I put on warm and soft slippers and I opened my room door.
" Yeah mom Im home." I yelled back. My throath was also feeling a bit sore and it hurted to speak.
" Come here and have dinner with us. I brought chinese food. Your favourite." she yelled and I could smell the fried noodles and chicken with vegetables.
" I'll be right there." I closed my door and I changed into my pajamas. I made sure that my clothes covered all the bruises and scraches. I added some toneyfying foundation to my face so she would notice that I had a black eye. I also pulled some hair to cover the left eye. I didn't want her to think that " I have been tripping all over the places again". Usually she just thinks that I've been wasted and fallen down on my own. And I don't even drink alcohol, Roger drinks for both of us.
" It's so nice that the whole family is together again . Right Amelia?" Roger said and smiled that fake smile of his. I knew that she wanted my mother out of the house as soon as possible so he could drink again and beat the crap out of me.
" Yeah it's so nice. Mom, you should really consider working home more instead of the office." I said with a fake cheery voice. Everything was so fake in this house and mother didn't notice a thing.
" Honey, you know I can't. It's part of my job that I spent time with the clients in the meetings." She answered and gave me a clean plate. I started to fill it up with the food.
" Why can't you ask the clients to come here?" I pressured her. I noticed that Roger hated my idea and he had to say something before my mother would even start to shink about my suggestion.
" But wouldn't it be just akward to mix home and work? And what if we are here and we do something silly, like show up somewhere with on our underwears?" Roger laughed and my mother joined him. Discussion was over.
" SO how has school been lately? I haven seen any papers lately..." Mom asked and she seemed like she didn't couldn't care less. It was just something she had to ask because she was my mom.
" Roger have signed all my papers. And school has been grate!" I exaterrated the grate a bit. My school work has suffered because I haven't been able to sleep in this horrible house.
" Don't lie to your mother. Your grades have been really lousy these days. Last week she brought back a math exam and she got F! Can you believe her?" Roger said and mother looked like she had just swallowed too big piece of food right that moment.
" Are you seriouse? But you've always been so good at math. What happened?" Mom asked and Roger looked at me like he could murder me if I would say anything against him.
" I don't know. Maybe I just don't get those stupid math calculations anymore!" I said and I stopped eating. Suddenly I felt full.
" Or maybe you just come home so late and do god knows what with your friends and you don't concentarde on your schoolwork anymore!" Roger lied again and mom seemed to buy that. I had no clue what friends he was talking about because I didn't have them. Not even one.
" OR MAYBE IT'S BECAUSE YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE! " I yelled and mom seemed to be confused now.
" Have I missed something?" Mom asked but I shushed her down.
" Maybe I hadn't been able to consentrade on my school work lately because your lousy husband is an alcoholic and beats the crap out of me here everyday." I yelled and lifted up my sleeve. It was bruised all over.
" Don't bad mouth about Roger! I can't believe you Amelia, we've already discussed about this so many times. How many times do I have to say that Roger don't drink anything but water? He's been sober for years! But about you Im not so sure! Tomorrow morning Im taking you to drug tests. Roger mentioned earlier that you've been acting really weird lately and now I believe him!" She yelled at me and I escaped the room.
My heart was hurting. How could my own mother believe such man over me? How could she even doubt my word? I've never ever lied her about anything in my life! I cursed my life and I didn't know what to do.
I didn't have any other place to go. My own father died when I was only two years old. I don't have any relatives near by. If I call the social service they'll just belive my mother and laugh at me. I don't have any friends anymore. I felt so frustrated.
But I did what I had to do. I escaped. There was no future for me in this house. There was only death. I knew that if I didn't leave the house now, I would be dead as soon as mother was gone. Roger would not forgive me for what I said. He would beat me until I'd stop breathing.
I took my backpack and I stuffed it full of clothes and other nececcary stuff that I usually need. I took all my savings from the piggypank, total 500$. I changed my clothes into jeans and sweater. I laced up my black converse shoes and I turned on my ipod. Stereo Skyline blasted trough my headphones. I left my home keys and my phone on the desk. I didn't leave a note and I didn't think twice about what I was about to do. My decision might have been the stupidest or the best thing that I've ever done.
I opened my room window and I climbed out. It was already late at night and the september weather was chilly. Luckily my room was on the downfloor so I didn't have to make any amazing stunts to get out of the house. Luckily all I needed to do is climb out of the window and not to make any sound while destroying our roses that were planted under my window.
As soon as I got out of our yard I started running. I ran as fast as I could. The feeling of fresh and cool night air running trough my lougns felt nice. I felt free. I could almost fly. And even though I could feel one of my ribs hurting it didn't matter.
But I wasn't free completely. I knew that if I stayed in this town, they would start looking for me and eventually they would catch me. And I would be sent back to that miserable life of mine in that hellish house.
I went into the nearest pub that I could find. I had left my cellphone at my desk so I had to find a phone that I could use. I needed to call to the traveling agency and ask wich was the cheapest way to get out of this town and out of this state.
The pub was almost empty. Only few men and women were sitting there and drinking their beers and eating something greazy looking. The place smelled stuffy and cigarette smoke was floding in the air. Furnitures were all blak and dark red. I got a warm and welcoming feeling as soon as I stepped in. It was like a whole another world behind the door I just walked trough.
I looked for some workers and after a while I noticed a young guy with dark hair cleaning the tables. I walked up to him and I tapped his shoulder with my fingertips. His body stiffened and he turned around to see who had tapped his shoulder. When he saw mee he relaxed a bit.
" What do you want?" He asked with his soft manly voice. He sounded a bit rude and his way of speaking was really fast. Like he was feeling angry. I recognized that from the way that Roger always speaks when he is angry at me. I took a small step back automatically.
" Uhh...." I managed to say. He look straight into my eyes. I notoced that his eyes were multicolored. Some brown and some green and some grey. Darker and lighter. He looked at me like an guestionmark and I had to open my mouth: " Do you have a phone here? I left mine at home and I really need to make a phonecall!"
" Sure. It's behind that corner where the toilets are also. But you'll have to order something first before you can use the phone!" He said and walked behind the bar desk. Crap. I started to rummage trough my pockets to find some coins. I didn't want to spend my money to unneccecary things but I guessed that I could get a water.
" Water with ice pleace." I asked and he nodded his head and started pouring me a glass of water and he added some rocks in there. He smiled gently and gave the water to me.
" Enjoy your water!" He said and I thanked him. He seemed really polite. And the angriness was gone from his voice. I gave him a polite smile and he disappeared to the back room.
I took my water and I went where the phone was. I took the phone book and I started to search for a traveling companys phone number. I took few minutes but I finally found it. I had seen their advertisement on tv few times and they advertises really cheap ways to travel across the country.
" Travel with cheapness, Alyssa Hayworth. How can I help you?" Some cold sounding woman answered the phone.
" This is Amelia Stone. I would like to purchase a ticket to... North Dakota. The cheapest one please." I said and I could hear the woman tapping her computer.
" It's 209 $." She said and I sighted. I didn't afford to pay that much because I still needed money for an apartemnt. And Norh Dakota was my only chance. It was near but also very far. I knew to travel there was the cheapest option. So I gave up. I hung up the phone without saying anything. I got really depressed.
I went back to sit infront of the bar desk. I drank my water and that waiter guy came back. He seemed to notice that something was wrong. Good intuition I guess.
" Need something stronger?" He asked while whiping a glass with a dirty rag. I felt disgussed. I started to wonder if he had whiped my glass with that same rag. Well I guess it didn't matter and I didn't have a choise. Underaged people shouldn't be sitting in bars anyways. It is against the law to offer alcohol to teenagers but that haven't stopped me before.
" Sure. But the thing I need most is a ride to somewhere out of this city and out of this state!" I said and I leaned against my hands. He started pouring me a shot.
" Why? Don't you like it here?" He asked and gave me the drink.
" Pierre is a nice city and all but I need a change of view! Really badly. I just don't have enough money to travel anywhere..." I said and his intrest seemed to grow word by word. I emptied the glass and he poured another.
" Well Im leaving this city tonight. Im going to see my family in Washington.If you want to go that way I can drop you off somewhere." He said and he seemed like an angel to me at that moment. I jumped off my seat and I went behind the desk and I jumped to his neck. He seemed really surprised.
" THANK YOU! YOU'RE A LIFE SAVIOR!" I shrieked and he laughed: " Well I love to help a girl in need!"
" So when do we leave?" I asked enthusiastically. I hadn't tought about his suggestion twice before answering. He could have been somekind of maniac. Even worse than Roger. But at that time I felt like everything was going to change into better. I was really naive.
" Well actually I think my sift ends in. 5...4...3...2... Now actually!" He said smilingly while taking off his apron. He told me to wait for a second while he went to the back room to grab his packs. He also had only one backpack filled with some necceccary stuff. I emptied the second glass.
He lead me out of the pub and we went to his car. It was some old black cadillac. Dirt was all over the car and the windows were darkened. His car would have been pretty if it wasn't so muddy. I stepped in and I threw my packbag to the backseat. He did also. Then I figured out one thing.
" We haven't introduced ourselfs yet! Im Amelia!" I said and he started the car saying: " Im Garret but it really doesn't matter what you call me."
" What do you mean by that?" I asked and he smiled: " Because you're just going to call me YOU all the time anyways!" I laughed at his joke. It really was a good point though. He started the engine and it sounded like a wild cats' moan or something like that.
" I like name Garret. It sounds British..." I said and he nodded his head: " It is actually. My parents lived in Britain before they had me. And they wanted to name me after their ancestors or something... I don't really know or care..." He drove away from the parking lot.
" Oh. That's nice. " I didn't have any other questions for him. It felt like my mind blanked out and everything welt so unneccecary. I watch the familiar city to pass by infront off my eyes. But when we passed my house, my heart suddenly felt heavy. The lights were on in my room and I could see Rogers' shadow in the livingroom. Discusting.
" You seem oddly tense!" Garret said and looked at me quickly. I sighed and looked back at him: " Did you ever escaped from your parents house when you were living there?"
" All the time. Why do you ask?" He answered.
" Why did you escaped?" I asked ignoring his question to me.
" Because I just wanted to have fun with my friends. But again, why do you ask?" He said and I had to think about my answer for awhile.
" Well then you don't obviously understand me but Im still going to tell you. I escaped our house tonight and Im planning to get as far as I can go from that house and I don't plant to go back! I don't want to see him ever again!" I said getting pissed off and Garret got a little concerned.
" Why do you want to leave this place and who is that guy you don't want to see ever again. Did you have a bad relationship or something?" He asked without having a single clue about my situation.
" I think you can call that, a bad relationship. But it was between me and my stepdad." I said and then I lifted my sleeve and showed him my arm: " See these bruises? I didn't hit the floor because I fell or wanted it myself!"
" Then what about your mother? She must have noticed something?" He asked sounding actually interested of me.
" She is the blindest person in the entire world that I know. Im sure she don't even notice that Im gone until she wants to nag about something!" I said pissed off. I get easily pissed off everytime I talk about my mother.
" Damn girl, chill. I can almost hear your heart beating faster than this cars' engine is rolling!" He said and it sounded really funny. I started laughing. I don't know what was so funny but I laughed. Maybe it was the feeling that he cared about what I said.
" You're like the first person ever to listen my words." I said and he looked at me quickly again.
" You must be kidding. Right? How is it possible to ignore you speaking when your voice is so soft and you're really smart!" He said and I blushed a little bit. He made me feel warm inside.
" No, Im not smart. If I was smart I would have left that place a long time ago... " I said and he shook his head: " It is smart to wait and prepare yourself for the long trip ahead of you. If you can't go back there you must have a grate plan in mind. Want to share it with me." He said and he made me feel even more stupider than I already was.
" No plan. Nothing is waiting for me and Im not waiting for anything. Im just a girl without destination!" I told him the truth.
" Well now you got yourself a destination. Washington DC. What happens there is really up to you!" He said and he sounder really positive about everything he said to me. He was right in everything that he said and it wasn't hard for me to start trusting a starnger like him.
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