I Said I'd Never Let You Go, And I Never Did {A Jack Barakat One Shot}

So, I'm pretty sure this is my longest one shot ever. And, it contains the song Have Faith In Me by A Day To Remember. Enjoy! :D Love&ATL, Karie

Created by crazy4u9794 on Tuesday, June 22, 2010



Have faith in me
Cause there are things that I've seen I don't believe
So cling to what you know and never let go
You should know things aren't always what they seem

“Let’s just calm down for one second.” My mom said calmly.

“No, Sue, I can’t! This is getting harder and harder for me to deal with!” My dad shouted.

I could see the tears falling down her face and she tried to plead with him.

“Please….just don’t do this….” She said softly.

I huddled closer to the wall, afraid to peek around the corner. I pulled the carpet anxiously, waiting to hear what my dad would say next.

I’d heard them yelling all the way from my room upstairs, and I sat just yards away from my kitchen at the base of the stairs. As far as I knew, my parents had no clue that I was listening in on their argument.

“I’m sorry….I just can’t. Maybe it’s time fo-“

“No.” My mom snapped. “Don’t say it.”

What was he going to say? Sure, my parents had been fighting recently, but….he wouldn’t, would he?

He sighed. “A divorce.”

I said I'd never let you go, and I never did
I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it
If you didn't have this chance then I never did
You'll always find me right there, again

Slamming my door, I fell against it. My body shook with sobs, and I fumbled for my phone. I tried desparately to press the right buttons, but my hand was shaking so much, and I could barely see straight.

Taking a few unsteady breaths, I rubbed my eyes just enough to focus my vision. Pressing ‘J’ under contacts, I found the number I was looking for.

“Jack…” I sobbed. “Please come over.”

Jack didn’t ask questions. He didn’t even hesitate.

“Give me 3 minutes.” He replied.


I uncurled my legs from my chest and steadied myself, walking towards my window. I fumbled with the lock, eventually pulling it open. Jack slid inside, immediately wrapping his arms around me.

His comfort brought back all of the memories that I’d tried to forget, and another wave of tears made their way down my face.

He rocked me back and forth gently, whispering nothings into my hair. My face was pressed against his chest, and my legs were in his lap. He pushed a lock of my hair out of my eyes, staring at me in a way that told me he wanted to know what had happened to make me so distraught.

“They’re getting a divorce.” I whispered, finally finding my voice.

Jack’s eyes softened. He knew how much my family meant to me. And I was watching it fall apart right before my eyes. He pulled my face back to his chest, running a hand up and down my back slowly.

“I’m so sorry…” He said sympathetically.

“I always used to think my family was so much better than others, because we could stay together. My parents were the only ones out of all my friends’ that didn’t get a divorce. And now that’s all gone.” I shook my head in disbelief.

Jack lifted my face up to his, looking deeply into my eyes.

“Don’t think like that. Your parents have lasted longer than most, and there may even still be hope. People say things when they fight! Maybe they didn’t mean it.” He smiled reassuringly.

“I guess we’ll find out.” I laughed shakily, wiping the tears from my cheeks.

Jack kissed my forehead, running his fingers through my hair. I leaned my forehead against his, closing my eyes and breathing deeply.

Jack had some sort of power over me. He could heal me in just a few moments.

I heard Jack exhale sharply, and I opened my eyes to see him staring back at me. He glanced quickly down at my lips, then back up to my eyes. I smiled slightly, moving a hand to his cheek. His fingers stroked the bit of bare skin on my back where my shirt had lifted, and he slowly leaned down, brushing his lips against mine.

My hand moved to the back of his neck, and I was about to press my lips against his, when I heard a voice from downstairs.

“Sierra?” My mom called.

I groaned, opening my eyes. Jack pulled away quickly, running a hand through his hair. He looked flushed and irritated, and I smiled.

“Sorry.” I giggled.

“Why are you laughing?” Jack wondered.

I shrugged. “It’s just funny. You should probably head home before my mom comes up here looking for me.”

He stood up, kissing my cheek quickly before climbing back out of the window.

I've gone crazy
Cause there are things in the streets I don't believe
So we'll pretend it's alright and stay in for the night
What a world
I'll keep you safe here with me

Jack and I had been friends since day 1. I was born only a few days before him, so we’d literally grown up together. He meant more to me than any person on the planet, and what I felt for him couldn’t be put into words.

He was always there, whether I needed him or not. He was the most immature person on the planet, but he once told me that I brought out a side in him that no one had ever seen.

Around me, he felt himself wanting to care. He wanted to stop talking, and just watch a movie by my side. We’d never had awkward moments. Jack was the kind of person that could make any situation seem completely normal.

Even though I’d known him my whole life, he still surprised me each and every day. This boy had so many more levels than the average person, and most people had hardly even broken the surface.

Over the years, I’d fallen in love with him. But I’d known all along that was just bound to happen. We spent so much time together, and he’d been there through every single tough time I’d been through.

He was always the one to turn to, and we’d almost kissed on several occasions. I found myself longing more and more to taste what it would be like to have his lips on mine.

Part of me was positive that he felt the same way….but there was another part that wasn’t so sure.

I said I'd never let you go, and I never did
I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it
If you didn't have this chance then I never did
You'll always find me right there, again

Climbing my stairs again, I grabbed my phone from my pillow. I dialed my friend Karie’s number, and listened to the phone ring while I formed what to say.

“Yello?” She answered happily.

“Hey, Kar.” I smiled.

“Sierra! What’s up, girl?”

“Ummm….can I talk to you about something?” I asked nervously.

“Of course. What’s on your mind?” She wondered.

“Well….I…umm….ilovejack.” I said quickly.

I heard Karie choke on whatever she was drinking.

“You do?” She asked in shock.

“Is it really that much of a surprise?” I asked. “We spend so much time together.”

“I just always thought it was a friend thing.” She commented.

“Yes, well, not all of us can just hang out with guys like it’s nothing, Karie.” I joked.

“Yeah, yeah. Anyway, so I’m guessing you can’t decide whether to tell him or not?” She asked.

“Pretty much.” I laughed.

“Well…do you think he feels the same way?”

“Maybe. There’s times when he seems like he does, and times when he doesn’t.” I replied.

“And…you want me to be completely honest here?” Karie confirmed.

“Yes. Totally honest.” I said confidently.

“I think you may be risking too much by telling him.” She said hesitantly. “I mean, you’ve been friends all your life. You’re used to having him around. If you told him, and it ended badly….how would you feel if all of a sudden…he wasn’t there anymore?” She asked.

“I’d probably die.” I joked.

“Exactly. I’m just saying. It could be an amazing thing, but if you two dated, and then you broke up….you may just lose him as a friend.” She said apologetically.

Sighing, I groaned inwardly. “Why do you have to make so much sense? I had totally convinced myself that I was going to tell him!” I laughed.

“Uhh…sorry?” She giggled.

“Thanks, love.” I smiled.

“No prob. Call me later!” She shouted as I hung up.

I had to hand it to her, the girl made sense. I had a bigger chance of keeping Jack around if we were just friends.

And losing Jack would literally take the breath from my body.

I said I'd never let you go, and I never did
I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it
If you didn't have this chance then I never did
You'll always find me right there, again

“Honey, we have to talk to you.” My mom said softly, motioning for me to take a seat across from her on the couch.

My dad stared at me intently, and I knew what was coming.

“I’m sure you’ve noticed that lately….your father and I have been fighting a lot.” She started.

I could already feel the tears building up behind my eyes. I nodded.

“We….well….we’ve decided to get a divorce.” She said hesitantly. “I’m sorry, it’s just not working.” She sighed sadly.

I looked at my dad, wondering if he was going to let my mother do all the talking.

“I really am sorry.” He assured me. “But I have another piece of bad news….”

My mom shot me a sympathetic look, and I began to get nervous.

“I’ve accepted an amazing job offer.” He said with a smile. “But…I have to move.”

“Where?” I whispered.

“Across the country.” He sighed.

My heart shattered. The tears I had tried so hard to keep from falling began cascading down my cheeks.

“Oh….sweetie…” My mom said softly, standing up to comfort me.

“No, stop.” I snapped. “Just leave me alone.”

I stormed up my stairs, trying not to completely break down until I’d reached the safety of my bedroom.

Any other day, I would have pulled out my phone instantly and called Jack. But this time, I hesitated. If he came over, we’d most likely end up kissing. Karie’s advice came back to my mind, and I grimaced. If Jack kissed me, would I be able to pull away?

But then I heard my parents yelling downstairs. A new wave of tears fell down my face, and I realized that I needed Jack more than anything right now. I’d just have to deal with the side effects.

They've got me on the outside, looking in
But I can't see at all
With the weight of the world on my shoulders,
They just wanna see me fall

“It’s going to be ok.” Jack assured me. “This happens to people all the time. You’ll get through it. And…you have me.” He smiled.

We were lying on my bed, his arms wrapped around me.

“I do.” I nodded. “Thank you.”

Jack stroked my cheek lightly. “It’s my pleasure.” He grinned.

My head was tucked into the crook of his neck. His fingers brushed lightly over my bare shoulder.

“You know, every single time I’m around you….all I want to do is kiss you.” Jack whispered.

I closed my eyes, inhaling sharply. How did I know this was going to happen?

“Really?” I whispered.

Jack lifted my chin lightly.

“Really.” He smiled.

Then his lips were on mine. He rolled on top of me, his hands cupping my face. My hands were on his chest. I tried to force myself to pull away.

This was wrong.

We would get hurt.

But his lips felt so good against my own. I ran my fingers through his hair, and I felt his tongue brush lightly over my bottom lip. Playfully, I smirked and refused to part my lips. His teeth attacked my neck feverously as he tried desparately to find my sweet spot.

I stared up at my ceiling, knowing that the second he found it, I wouldn’t be able to resist him any longer. It was now or never.

I chose now.

I did the one thing I never thought I would ever have to do with Jack.

I pushed him away.

They've got me on the outside, looking in
But I can't see at all
With the weight of the world on my shoulders,
They just wanna see me fall

“We….we can’t.” I whispered.

Jack looked surprised. “Why not?”

“Because…we’re friends.” I stated simply.

“What if I want to be more? And don’t tell me you don’t want that. I know you do.” Jack said confidently.

I looked down at my feet. This was something I had to do. It would save the both of us from being hurt.

“No, that’s not what I want.” I said shakily.

Jack didn’t respond. I looked up to see tears falling down his face, and my heart instantly broke.

“Why not? You know me. Are you scared? Because you shouldn’t be.” He said quickly.

“I….I just don’t think it’s a good idea.” I said softly.

“A good idea? Are you kidding me? We would be better together than anyone on the planet! You know how well we go together!” He yelled.

“Stop, my parents will hear you!” I whispered-yelled.

Jack stood up, pacing around my room.

“You know me.” He started. “You know how well I’d take care of you! I want to be with you. I’ve wanted to be with you for years!” He pleaded.

“Jack, we’d both get hurt. I’d lose my best friend if it ended badly.” I tried to make him understand.

“Sierra, you can trust me! I’d never let that happen! Why can’t you have a little faith?” Jack whispered, holding my face in his hands.

“Please, just give me a chance.” He begged.

I closed my eyes, letting a few tears fall. He wiped them away with his thumbs, but it didn’t console me at all. I wanted to believe in Jack, but it wasn’t worth the risk. I didn’t want to lose him in my life.

“I….I can’t.” I shook my head.

I felt Jack remove his hands from my face. I kept my eyes closed, waiting for him to respond. When he didn’t, I opened my eyes. I expected to see him in front of me, but he was gone.

Have faith in me
I said I'd never let you go, and I never did
I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it
If you didn't have this chance then I never did
You'll always find me right there, again

---One Week Later---

Jack and I hadn’t spoken since that day. I hadn’t realized that being afraid of losing him, would actually make me lose him. I’d called so many times, but he never answered.

I was debating on whether to go to his house or not when my phone rang. I checked the Caller ID and answered it.

“Alex?” I asked.

“Sierra, you gotta call Jack.” He pleaded.

“I’ve been calling him!” I exclaimed.

“Try one more time. And…I think you should give him a chance.” He said unsurely.

“What are you talking about?”

“Sierra, he loves you! You mean more to him than anything. He wants you to want to be with him. He’d never do anything to hurt you, trust me. Please, just give him a chance. That’s all I ask.” He begged.

I sighed, running my fingers through my hair.

“I do want to be with him.” I whispered. “I’m just a little scared.”

“So is he! But he’s willing to take the chance for you. And you should be, too.” He said calmly.

“You’re right.” I smiled. “I’ll call him.”

“Good. Hurry.” Alex laughed.

“I will. Bye!” I said, hanging up.

I said I'd never let you go, and I never did
I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it
If you didn't have this chance then I never did
You'll always find me right there, again

Jack had sounded dead when I called. He’d reluctantly agreed to come over, and I was standing by my window, waiting for him to climb up.

He pulled himself through the crack, and sat on my bed. There were dark circles under his eyes, and I could tell that atleast 5 pounds had been shed off of his skinny frame.

“How are you?” I asked, smiling slightly.

“Fine.” He said blankly.

“You don’t look fine.” I commented.

“I haven’t slept much….” He whispered.

I smiled, kneeling in front of him.

“And why is that?”I asked.

“N-n-no reason.” He stuttered.

I smirked, grabbing the collar of his t-shirt. He looked shocked, but then smiled as I brought his lips to mine. His hands became tangled in my hair as I fell back onto the floor, Jack on top of me.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, and I felt him smirk against my lips. Just as I was about the bite gently on his bottom lip, I felt him hesitate.

He then pulled away.

“What about our friendship?” He asked.

Sliding my hands under his shirt, I leaned my forehead against his.

“I have faith in you.”

I said I'd never let you go, and I never did
I said I'd never let you go, and I never did
I said I'd never let you go, and I never did
I said I'd never let you go, and I never did

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