The Legend of Juggin Joe - A Preview of the Comedy Sensation You Dont Want to Miss!

As I recall this particular happenin, which we all referred tah as the "Froggin Incident", it all started out innocent enough. Twere on a pleasant summer Saturday gatherin at Doc an Isabels. The folks that had come tah call wuz enjoyin some mighty fine music an vittles an a couple swallers now an then ah some "Pick Me Up". This particular day Isabel had cooked up a mess ah frogs legs. I dont know about flatlanders, but as all hill folks know, they aint nothin quite so tasty as a fine batch ah fried frogs legs, an Isabels were first rate that afternoon. Sets muh mouth tah waterin jes thinkin on em even tah this day.
I cant recall how old Joe musta been around that time, but he werent taho big, jes a nubbin underfoot really, but Lord how that boy could put down them frogs legs. He would snatch them right off ah yer plate if yah werent watchin close, like the worlds supply ah frogs wuz dwindlin fast an he were determined tah get his share afore they disappeared altahgether. Course hed get his han slapped on occasion an a scoldin but never taho bad, cause truth be tahld, who could blame im As I say, Isabels frogs legs were considered some ah the best in the county.
When the last ah them legs wuz ate, young Joe looked about heart broke. There wuz still plenty ah other good snackin vittles around, like hush puppies an corn dodgers, some chicken gizzards an fried fish an sech, but in Joes mind, nothin else would do. He had the taste fer frogs legs an that wuz all there wuz tah it. He set tah squallerin somethin fierce till Isabel had about as much as she could stahmach ah it. "Joe" says she, "If yah want frogs legs, I reckon yah best git yerself down tah the cow pond early next Saturday afore I git tah cookin, an bring us on back as many as yah reckon yah can eat. Fer now, I want yah tah hush up yer mouth, an Ill hear no more bout it this day."
Now lookin back on it, they mightnt ah been the best choice ah words fer Isabel tah use with Joe, cause as I done already tahld yah, when Joe got an idea fixed in is mind, it lodged itself in, right sound an proper. Then an there I reckon, Joe thought ther werent enough frogs in the world tah sate his appetite, but he were goin tah give it is best tah find out one way er the other.
The week drifted by, an next Saturday mornin come as expected. Doc an Isabel had once agin tahld folks they wuz moren happy tah have em drop by, which wuz agreeable tah all. I muhself showed up kinda early tah help Doc haul some jugs down from the still, an tah provide some quality control assurance afore everone else got there, ifn yah catch muh drift.
Usually young Joe wuz right there along with his paw, on mornins sech as this, tryin tah help as younguns will, an generally bein moren a hindrance than a help, but we wuz used tah him bein around. This particular Saturday though, there werent nary a sign ah Joe tah be found. Doc didna seem concerned about is youngest sons absence. Doc tahld me that Joed got up afore the first light that mornin, an wuz out the door tah the sound ah the cocks crow.
We knowed ther werent no way that Joe would miss the weekly gatherin, so there werent no reason fer worry, though I did miss the little fella, an I reckon Doc did taho. It were unusual, but not unheard ah, fer him tah be off on some childish adventure on a Saturday mornin an I couldna help wonderin what idea had poked itself intah the boys head this time. Course me an Doc had fergot what Isabel done tahld that youngun the week afore, but young Joe hadna fergot one bit.
By the time we got the jugs down from the still, Isabel had covered the old plank table that sat off in the yard with a cloth an started tah set some vittles on it. The other Yakel younguns had brought out the old chairs that wuz kept jes fer this purpose, an scattered em about the yard fer the folks tah relax in. All that wuz lackin wuz the company, an that commenced arrivin straight off. I reckon it were about an hour past noon time with folks in the yard talkin. Those with an extra large appetite wuz munchin away, yers truly included. A bachelors gotta take advantage ah fine vittles when he can.
The boys wuz startin tah warm up ther instrements when I happen tah catch sight ah Joe headin on intah the house, luggin a great big ole burlap bag that seemed tah be filled up tah a size pert near as big as Joe hisself. He wuz a strugglin with it considerable, an I could see it were an open question tah who wuz controllin who, but he finally managed tah get the whole thang on intah the side door.
Upon reflectin on the sight fer awhile, I reckoned that it mightnt hurt tah mention tah Isabel that her youngun wuz up tah somethin, an so thats jes what I done. She, upon hearin the boy wuz back, an inside the dwellin no less, set off intah that house like a fox on the run, knowin Joe the way she did Bundle The Essential World History Volume Ii 6th The History Handbook.
I dont reckon it were moren a minute passed when the commotion started. The screen door flew open an out come Joe, a runnin an hollerin like the Unholy Hellion, an is maw Isabel trailin right behind. Now this in itself werent sech an unusual sight, an hardly called fer comment by those witnessin the event, but it did silence thangs down purty good. Everone wuz wonderin what Joe coulda done this time tah git the fire in his maw stoked so fast.
Now it so happens that the Parson Sheppard, jes the week afore, had done a sermon on Moses an the Pharaoh an the troubles that the Lord let down on Egypt cause ah ther wicked ways, which, as yah might recall, included amongst other thangs, a plague ah frogs. I can remember at the time a hearin that how I thought it were a kinda comical idea, an hardly fittin as an act ah the Lord as what harm could a mess ah frogs do anyhow But when I wandered on over tah the open front door an seed what wuz inside, well sir, I tahok tah quick unnerstandin ah what kinda trouble that there Pharaoh had with Moses.
Turns out that Joe had spent all them hours gatherin up ever frog that must ah lived in that derned pond. There wuz big ole grandaddy bullfrogs, an little bitty peepers, an ever size an shape ah frog in betwixt. The boy wuz a right good frogger an he proved it that day, but I dont allow Isabel counted that tahward his credit, leastwise not at that particular moment.
Ther musta been hundreds ah frogs in that house, jes a hoppin ever which way, an makin theyselves right tah home. I reckon Joe wuz bringin em all tah his maw in ther natural state fer her tah cook up, an hadna considered that it might be more prudent tah do the prepatahry work afore he lugged em all in.
Anyhow, about the time Isabel walked in tah see what Joe wuz up tah, the bag had proved taho much fer the lad tah maintain, an it got away from im, spillin its contents ontah the floor. Those captive hoppers saw ther chance fer freedom an done tahok it right quick. Joe parently tahok a look at his maws face, an likewise drawed the conclusion that this wuz his chance tah depart right quick. He scooted on past her afore the shock done wore off, headin fer the hills as fast as his legs would take im. Isabel wuz a quick witted woman, but the sight ah all them frogs scatterin themselves throughout her house gave Joe a couple ah seconds head start afore she could regain her sensibility an take off after im.
I jes praised the Lord that day I hadna mentioned tah her that I might ah stahpped Joe fer he got in the house with his cargo er I might a been right long side Joe skedaddlin it down the road with Isabel hot on muh trail as well, hickory switch in han, an bent on terrible justice. Even now, ifn she reads this here narrative, I reckon Ill still catch a peck ah hell fer it, as I dont spect that she ever quite got over the whole episode tah this day.
By the time Isabel come back, holdin Joe by the ear an a lecturin him fer all he wuz worth, with emphasis laid on by a switch, we had tried tah gather up all the frogs we could an clear the house ah em right proper. We had done a fair job ah it, but the mountain dew already consumed, along with the fits ah laughter that would catch hold ah us, werent a helpin the effort one little bit. On tahp ah which, those frogs had already been caught once that day an were determined not tah let it happen agin. I dont know if we gathered as much as we scattered but it were the thought that count. Leastways thats the way I saw it, though Isabel an Doc didna seem tah share the sentiment atall.
Even Doc, who generally could hanle most anythin, wuz fired up considerably fer quite a spell. He tahld me it wuz weeks afore he could lay down in is bed er git up in the night without wonderin if somethin slimy wuz a gonna git squashed underneath im. I reckon frogs underfoot is worse than younguns, an a squashed frog must be a terrible mess tah clean up in the house.
An ah course, there wuz the problem ah them frogs that crawled off tah outta the way places tah meet ther maker. Lord, yah couldna walk in that house fer quite a spell without an unappealin odor sorta sneakin up on yah, which caused Isabel no end ah embarrassment.
Poor Joe, I reckon he caught a whoopin bout evertime another frog wuz found in the house fer a week an maybe more. Nine West Anya (taupe) Footwear Whats even worse wuz Isabel didna take taho kindly tah all the good natured kiddin that come her way, an she refused tah make frogs legs the rest ah the summer. Which jes goes tah show the irrationality ah women, cause when yah think about it, how much more convenient could it ah got fer her, what with all those frogs hidin out right there in er own house An she done tahld Joe he could fetch as many as he thought fit anyhow.
Berlin 07 (digipak) An thats the great Juggin Joe frog gatherin stahry which is still talked about up in the hills even untah this day, but not in the presence ah Isabel though. Docs temperament softened up eventually, an he even saw the humor in it, but maybe not as much as the rest ah us.
Joe still loves them frogs legs, an Isabel got back tah preparin em on ocassion, but after that episode, she was plum clear in her discussion with Joe bout exactly how many frogs he could catch in the pond, an left no doubt in anyones mind that they wuznt gonna be brought back intah the Jeckel household agin.