Less talking more kissing (Draco Malfoy) 87

It was nighttime, the moon casting off a radiant beam of light, with the stars twinkling bright (ha ha made a rhyme). And the cold night air blowing it's way through your open window and into your room letting it's cold winds freeze you to what felt like 0 degrees Celsius. All was pleasant except for the fact that you were freaking out on how the funeral was in only in 3 days! *3 days! How could they make something so... important in only 3 days!*. You tried to distract yourself by reading a book you bought at "Your All Time Favourite Bookstore"... okay that Draco bought at "Your All Time Favourite Bookstore" ...and yea, that was actually the name. But that was passed the point! All it did was bring your thoughts to... something disturbing therefore you tried cleaning, that always got your mind off things. But your room was already spotless... even in those hard to reach corners *... I should have left those for later... meaning today* you thought while sighing. So then that drifted your body off to your closet, and your hands started picking out your outfit for the big day *way to get my mind off things...*. As you looked through your clothes you notice that most of your black dresses or black outfits were not... what you can say "appropriate" ...especially for a funeral. "I'm a whore!" you say bewildered as you stare in your closet totally and unbelievably offended... *whore? I thought I was... was... at least not a whore!* you shook your head in disbelief "... I'm a dirty dirty whore, me of all people!" you felt arms circle around your waist. "Wouldn't say a dirty dirty whore..." the source wrapping it's arms around you kissed your cheek "more like..." it drifted off "... a dirty elegant whore" you smirked "total oxymoron". "Not a muggle. Don't care" you smiled turning around to see the source was Draco. He tightened his grip on you "so are you gonna clam down or do I have to stun you again?" you slightly pulled away from him feeling a little claustrophobic, but still facing each other. "This" you waved your hands in front of you "this isn't funny... all my clothes are..." you thought about it "... well you know how my clothes are" you crossed your arms over your chest. He grinned thinking "I do, beautiful on how easy it is to get you naked" "Draco!" you hit him "your not helping". "I'm joking," he said laughing and rubbing the arm your punched him in. He brought his hands to your waist smirking at your stressed out face. *Need something to wear, something... none whore like* "and what's so bad about dressing like..." he looked at you "like how you do, being an elegant whore is perfectly respectable nowadays" your smirked, wanting to say something but too lazy to retort anything. "But your right" he kissed your forehead "about your clothes" he kissed the tops of your nose "they look very..." you see a mischievous smirk cross his lips. "... Very (kiss on cheek) very (kiss goes down to corner lips)... wholesome" he smiled and kissed you, you got a little used to kissing Draco again, you weren't all there yet but you were okay with his... little "attempts" at romance. He pulled away "see" you looked at him "I didn't need to stun to calm you down" you rolled your eyes with a light smile playing on your lips, you felt better that you saw her... in her state, still were upset but felt better. "Are gonna go shopping or something?" you shook your head "I'll come with you" you gave him a look "promise". You smirked and shook your head "your the last person I want to go shopping with" he brought his hand up to his heart "what do I do instead of pay for..." he thought about it "everything... I actually pay for everything!" "Not true! I paid for..." you had to think about this one. "I pay for plenty of things" "like?" he ask crossing his arms over his chest. "Like..." *I know I pay for things, but what...* "food!" *ha ha* "I pay for food, drinks... parking etc". Draco had an amusing smile stamped on his lips "taking my money out of my wallet doesn't count as you paying". "Well... your impatient!" you say changing the subject "who wouldn't be, no one takes 2 hours to get ready!" "Many people do" "to go out for a walk?" you put your hands on your hips "I had to look good didn't I?" "We were going around the block" "twice" you say defending yourself. He rolled his eyes in defeat "and plus, I don't want to go shopping" you say running a hand through your hair trying to even it out. "That's a first" "first time for everything" he nodded walking over to your bed, you turned back around for a dress to wear. "Wear a skirt" "too short" "pants?" "Too low" "shirt?" "Too tight" "... anything to get your mind off of this?" he asked with a slight laugh "can't find" you felt him smile as he got off your bed and took you... more like forced you away from your closet and back onto your bed. "Talk to me" "about?" you ask trying to keep yourself from fidgeting "what's bugging you..." you were about to reply something sarcastic till Draco cut you off. "I meant," he said firmly "you've already seen her... peacefully" you smirked at how he was trying to piece the words together "... so then why are freaking out on seeing her again?" you looked up at him. Saw that he was rewording what he said in his mind making sure that what he just said wasn't going to upset you. You sighed, rolling over on your stomach and looked at your headboard while playing with a nail that was about to chip off if you kept playing with it. "I saw her, your right. But it's different this time; it's last time I see her! Heck the Wake was the last time I saw her" you looked up at your headboard "I didn't even get to spend that match time with her..." "I asked you if yo-" "I know, I know, and I refused. Not your fault so don't worry about it" you looked at your chipping nail. "I highly doubt there gonna open up the sarcophagus again..." you flipped your hair annoyingly but it only fell back into place. Therefore, resolving your little problem your grabbed for a hair elastic from your nightstand "they're burying her... in the dirt, six feet under". You finished tying your hair in your messy bun and just closed your eyes to open them back up again to feel Draco wrap his arm around you, letting you rest your head on his shoulder totally rearranging your position . You knew he was thinking of what to say... the perfect thing to say, therefore he said nothing for a few minutes. He opened his mouth to say something but closed it shut again. "... Draco" "yea?" "You remember when we were back at school and I asked you if you ever thought of killing yourself?" "Yea..." "you never answered the question." ... "Draco?" "Why are you thinking about that?" you shrugged "seems like death's everywhere, it can happen in a second... we can even die tomorrow, or even tonight" he nodded "your right" "so did you?" you ask looking up at him. He looked back at you "... it's not important" you starred at him confused "lets just go to bed okay?" he crawled under the covers and waited for you to join him. "Your not gonna tell me?" "Tell you what?" you starred at him for a couple of minutes "lets just go to bed okay?" he said again looking away while you just nodded. "Want me to answer the question?" you, asked after you both got settled in and the lights were turned off "not really". You waited for a minute "...you sure?" you waited again, but this time for him to answer. He opened one eye and saw that you weren't going to give up. He sighed "if it'll let me sleep". You smirked "okay then" he didn't say anything which you think meant that you could continue "I thought about it, couple of times" you felt his grip tighten on you. "Once when that guy... touched me, another time when my mom and I were having a fight, when you and me broke up..." you went on and on. Listing him the times you wanted to kill yourself and even how you wanted to do it, the ones you can remember that is. Which you think disturbed him... a lot. "... And when I saw my grandmother in the sarcophagus... she just looked so peaceful, I wondered how it would be like. To just be with her..." you and Draco were facing each other, his face resting on your white pillow as well as yours, your heads both facing each other. He was playing with tresses of your hair that came out of your bun. "That's a long list" you shrugged "if you think about I guess" he starred at you. "Your not going to do any of them are you?" you shrugged "depends on the moment, right?" he looked at you quietly "...I never knew you thought of those things" he said it as a low as a calm whispers. "It's not something I share with people" "your sharing it with me" you looked at him "your different" "how?" you shrugged "your people, your Draco" he smirked and kissed your forehead. "You don't have to tell me if you thought of it or not... right now that is" he smirked again. You've learned how to keep your distance in Draco's business, and it was working wonders in your relationship, hardly any fights. "Lil" you looked up at him "... If you ever killed yourself... I'd join you..."
You see people, that just love right there! So sweet... but yet, in a creepy romantic way *grins*
You and Draco spent the rest of the night in your room, holding each other, cuddling, sometimes kissing but mainly sleeping. It was the next day and your morning went 'okay' could have been better... but since now it was nighttime your evening was going... well... not the best. Right now you were lying in bed with Draco's agile, warm arms around you. You didn't know why but you were in a very cranky mood, if anyone talked or at least tries to you'd just get pissed off, and for what? Them trying to talk to you make conversation? For example Draco tried to talk to you but instead of talking back you just snapped at him... every time. "Something wrong?" "no" you said for what felt like the 50th time "Lil ta-" you sighed angrily "am I Draco! Like good God aren't you listening? Like what more do you want?" he shook his head getting a little annoyed with your attitude towards him. "Annoyed now?" you ask pulling away from him, he seemed happy about letting you go "what's up your ass?" you glared at him then got out of bed, you needed to do something, anything for that matter... just need to get away... especially from Draco. You crossed your arms and walked over to your window where the moon and the stars were reflecting it's gorgeous light once more. The day after tomorrow was going to be the funeral, and as the day was approaching your confidence in accepting that she was gone was crumbling and crumbling away like brushing off saw dust with your hand after a hard days work. You looked back at Draco seeing that he was just resting on your bed. (Position: hands behind head, legs crossed, no covers on him showing his polka doted boxers) *what is he even doing here?* you rolled your eyes and looked back at your window. "Are you coming back to bed?" you didn't respond, instead just ignored him. You heard your bed creak, which you guessed, meant he got out of bed. He wrapped his arms around you and kissed your neck "I'm sorry" he brought his lips up and kissed your cheek. "About what?" he shrugged "for being an ass I guess" you turned to him "if you don't even know why your saying sorry, then don't apologize" "I know why I'm saying sorry" "then why shrug or say "I guess"?" "force of habit" you rolled your eyes and shoved pass him. "What the fucks up with you? You were perfectly fine this morning" "well Draco" you said turning in his direction "if you haven't noticed, look outside. You'll see it's not fucking morning anymore". He looked down shaking his head seeming pissed off. "Do you need time alone or something?" your crossed your arms standing in a 'know it all' pose. "And why would I need that Draco?" "dunno, some grieving process or something" "what do you know..." you said it in a whisper so he wouldn't hear you. "What?" "Nothing" you both stood there quietly *why the hell am I even with him, he's got nothing going for him in life excepts his good looks* you shook your head. Draco ran his hands over his face then through his hair. He took a breath and opened his mouth, to try and talk to you. "I don't know why your acting like a bitch right now but-" you were about to say something but his finger - which was shaking from anger - "but, lets just go to bed and try and get some sleep" you starred at him, waiting for him to say something else. But instead he remained quiet waiting for your answer. You and nodded as you both just stood there not saying a word to each other but just staying in silence. "... okay" he nodded still remaining quiet, probably trying to control his temper from your... "attitude". As soon as you both got into bed and got comfortable, like a jolt, a memory that you totally forgot you had floated into your mind. You looked straightforward getting confused, angry... then upset, making your breathing become harder then before. Your throat quickly tightened into a knot making it seem impossible to talk. "I..." Draco looked over at you "what" your eyes burned with tears as in about a second tears started crashing down like waterfalls. Draco turned to you impatiently but when he saw you face expression his face softened and his eyes burned with worry. "Baby, wh-" you covered your face with your hands and started crying. "Lil, wh- what's going on?" Draco seemed panicked at your sudden outburst in your unsuspected cries, he pulled you over to him as you started crying onto his chest. "I..." you kept saying "I" over and over again but still couldn't get the words out. "Shh" he rubbed your back "shh" you covered your mouth in shock at what you remembered and just hammered on tears. Draco held you tighter as you sat on his lap, him rocking you back and forth. "Baby its okay" he kissed your forehead "shh", you shook as you started invigorating new tears. Minutes went by but your body didn't want to function with your mind as you kept crying. You tried to stop yourself but at your every attempt it plummeted to failing, cause you to cry harder then before, almost making you pass out from not breathing. Draco tried his best but even his words weren't helping, not like they used to anyway. About 25 minutes into your hazardous crying scenario, you felt your body give out, making your tears slow down "... Lil" You cuddled your head to his neck still crying but quietly. "... What is it?" you shook your head feeling yourself about to start crying again... loudly. "I-I hate myself" Draco rubbed your back kissing the top of your head "for what?... What did you do?" you shook your head again "... kill me" those 2 words alone killed something in Draco, you felt his breathing quicken and his body tense. He moved his head/neck away so your faces were face to face. He looked straight in your eyes, frowns of apprehension crossing over his face. "What's going on?" you looked down at your hands. "I..." you shook your head "why did I say it...?" you say looking at your hands "say what?" you looked at him heartbroken. "The last time I saw her" you whipped your tears away "I told her..." it was hard enough thinking about it but worse actually repeating it. "I told her..." you shook your head "I told her" "what did you tell her?" Draco asked stroking a piece of your hair. "Why did I say it?" "What Lil? What did you say?" you looked at him mournfully. "I told her to go away, but when she wouldn't I yelled at her..." you started scratching at your wrist feeling like there were igniting off your skin "I said... "Why don't you do us all a favour and but out of our lives... for good" (I know I know, not that great but can't think of anything!)" you shook your head starting to cry again, you fell on Draco's chest and cried unmercifully "I didn't mean to say it!" Draco was quiet looking at your once again dejected body. "She knows that" you shook your head feeling like it was the last straw "I killed her! it was me!" Draco stopped rubbing your back "what?" "she always listened to me, and I told her to but out of our lives and she did, Draco she did!" "No she didn't Lil, you didn't kill her" you shook your head "I killed her, I did it" you shook your head feeling your body reject... everything. "I- I killed someone" "Lil stop!" " I never got to apologize" "Lil it-" you pulled your head away from him "you don't get it, I killed her! I killed someone! I killed my grandmother!" "Lil you didn't kill anyone, especially your grandmother... baby it wasn't you" "then why did she die? Me. Cause of me and what I said to her! she believe that that's what I wanted... all she wanted was to give me what I wanted!" "it was her time to go!" you shook your head "she could have lived forever" Draco brought his hands to the side of your face "baby, no one can... no one can live forever" you shook your head. "She could" Draco brought you back to him "shh" he stroked your hair "not your fault" "... none of this is your fault" he was whispered to your head. "Draco!" you clenched at his T-shirt. "I-" "stop, Lil stop. None of this is your fault, none of it..." you buried your head into his neck, wanting to feel Draco's embrace all around you. You tried not to think about it and tried to blame it on someone else, but there was no one to blame... who could you blame? *think... think*. You remembered the only reason you said that was because you were upset... but about what? you couldn't remember why you were upset. *Why was a so mad?* it took a lot to get you so pissed off that you would scream at your grandmother. No one or- *Draco*... you looked up at him then remembered that you were upset because you and Draco broke up. You pulled away from him looking at him in dismayed. "This..." you whipped a tear away "this is your fault" you say slowly piecing everything together. He looked at you confused. "What's my fault?" you got off him and out of bed "you cheated on me... if you didn't... if you didn't cheat on me then I would have never have said that!". He looked startled at your assumption "where did this come from?" "you cheated on me!" "I didn't cheat on you" "you did, with Pansy! Don't you remember? In my room, on my bed!" "Lil that wasn't me! you told me you believed me!" he got out of bed also coming over to you. "Lil" he took your arm but you snatched it away "you got me upset!" he looked at you aghast. "Lil I-!" "YOU MADE ME SAY IT!" he was so overwhelmed he looked like he needed to sit down. "How could I?" "YOU... YOU CHEATED ON ME!" "I-" "I wouldn't have said that if it weren't for you! you ruined it... YOU KILLED HER!" Draco was at a lost for words "Lil I-" you pushed him away as he tried to hold you "Lil just wa-" "NO, GET OUT! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Draco was breathing hard. "I WANT YOU GONE!" "Lil" he tried to hold you again but yet again you pushed him away. "I MEAN IT! GET OUT!" he starred at you "I came her for you, I left school for you!" you shook your head "I DON'T CARE, GO BACK... GO BACK TO YOUR PRECIOUS SCHOOL, I DON'T NEED YOU HERE". Draco took this all in "I SAID GET OUT!" "I-" WERE OVER!" he looked stunned, like someone just shot him in the heart. "Your kidding me?" you shook your head getting the facts straight "Lil-" "WERE OVER FOR GOOD, I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU... GET OUT!" you grabbed the closes thing to you and through it at him, he dodge it looking alarmed "GET OUT! I SAID GET OUT!" you grabbed something else and through at him again - they were both vases filled with fake flowers - you grabbed something else but by then Draco was at your door with his pants in hand. "Lil-" you through another vase but Draco closed the door shielding himself from it. You ran over and locked the door, Draco tried opening it but it was no use. "LIL WAIT, JUST TALK TO ME" "GO AWAY!" he tried talking to you through the doors but you just told him how you hated him and that you would never love him again. Or anyone else for that matter, how his parents were right on hurting him, how his father had the right to beat him etc. after not hearing anything, you think he gave up. You covered your mouth with your hands feeling like everything made no sense. *He made me say it, he made me do it, it wasn't me* a small part of you didn't believe that but it was all you could go on and you weren't going to blame all this on yourself. You fell on your bed crying maniacally, hand still covering your mouth as you held your pillow tight. *Not my fault, his fault, only his fault*
I'm soooo freaking tired right now you have no idea... but the story must go on!
As you woke up you felt cold, remarkably cold. You look around to see your room was a mess, broken pieces of your hundred dollar vases were all over the floor in little small bits and bites. You rubbed your eyes trying to get a better look even though all around was pure darkness except for the dim light of the moon shinning in. You rubbed your arms still feeling cold till you noticed that something was missing. You look over, beside you where usually Draco would sleep. *Where is he?* you got up, sitting on your bed thinking where the devil got to. "Draco" you called out *maybe he's in the bathroom* you got up and walk over *mother fucker!* you winced as you step on s shard of your vase *need a broom, going to get myself a broom*. You hopped on one foot, praying to God that your other foot didn't step on a shard. You knocked on your door to your bathroom, even though the lights were out. "Draco, baby you in there?" you heard nothing. You opened the door and saw no one was in there, strange. *He must have left me a note* he always left you a note indicating to where he was. You look at your bedside table but there was no note *this is so not funny anymore*. Then like a flash of camera it hit you. *... Draco!* you recalled what you said to him and covered your mouth almost instantly *me- I- shit!* you retched your door open and ran around the house - almost 2 am -. You ran around upstairs, checking rooms, bathroom, closets... even hampers. You kept looking for Draco but he was still nowhere to be seen. You ran downstairs, almost falling a couple of times *who made these stairs to steep!*. You looked everywhere downstairs till you landed in your kitchen, feeling that there was a presence there. But as you drew yourself closer, you looked in and saw your dad drinking some tea and reading a garden magazine. "Dad!" he jumped up a little as he looked up at you "Lili hunny, what are you doing up?" you were out of breath from running everywhere. "Where's Draco?" you had to get some air into your lungs fast or you would pass out... soon. "Oh..." he places his magazine and tea down "he left hunny". Your eyes shot out as you felt yourself almost faint from the anxiety of Draco actually not being here. "wh-why!? How could you let him go!" "he told me that that's what you wanted" you bite back the feeling of wanting to kill your father. "That's not what I wanted!" *no no no.* You took in a breath "are you sure he left?" your dad checked his watch "he left about 40minutes ago but the bus doesn't get here till... about 10 minutes." As soon as his sentence was done you bolted out of the kitchen, out of your front doors and into the blistering cold. "LILIAN" you looked back to see your farther standing by the door "LILLIAN GET BACK HERE!". You heard a noise, which made you turn your head to see the bus pulling up to the bus terminal. You heard the doors open and Draco's blonde hair poking it's way into the front gates, getting into the bus. "Draco!" he stopped "Draco wait!" you caught up to him "what are you doing here?" Draco asks looking at you then back behind you, probably to see if your dad or someone was behind you. You shook your head trying to get everything straight as you felt like you've just ran a marathon. *Really need to start working out* "I don't want you to go, I was just mad!... I know you didn't kill her, that you didn't make me say those things I was just upset!" you say frantically trying to get everything out "where's your jacket?" He asks looking at your disappointedly. "Draco" you brought your hands around his waist "I'm sorry alright, I want you to come back" "Lil-" "please" "I'm getting tired of this" you nodded. "I know I know, but I'll work on it, I will" he pushed you off him... gently. "Lil..." he looked at you "eh Kid, you comin or what?" Draco looked back at the bus driver telling him to give him a minute "... you were right... what's the point of me staying her anymore. You have your family, that Damien guy..." he started listing all these people "but they don't mean anything to me! I need you to be there, I want you!". Draco said nothing "Draco please, I wan-" "I don't care, not anymore, I try to help you and you..." his hands stretched outward "you yell at me, what's the point anymore. You said, were over so were over." "BUT I DIDN'T MEAN IT!" Draco took a step back "to late" he brought his luggage on the bus - the driver helping him - he looked back at you "... I'll see you in school." "Draco no!" you grabbed his arm he shook your grip off and continued walking in the bus "Draco please!" the door closed as you started banging on the door. You saw him take a seat "Draco please! Please I didn't mean it! I DIDN'T DRACO!" and with that he was gone...
You bolted up with a start, your body fully alert. You were breathing extra hard this time as your body was covered in sweat, with your hands all calmly and wrinkly. You in your room, yet again in the dark, you quickly looked over to see yet again that Draco wasn't there. "NO!" you yelled quickly throwing the messed up covers that were tangled all around over to the side as you sprang out of bed and ran out your doors... again. You stepped on pieces of your vases, which cut through your feet but you didn't care and continued running. "Draco!" you yelled his name over and over, louder and louder as you ran around your house... but there was no response, not one single pin drop. "Draco please!" *how could my parents sleep through this?* you tripped on your rug and fell hard on your carpet *fuck* your felt your knee cringe in pain as it hit hard on the floor. You cried for the pain of your knee and for Draco not being here. You saw light coming out from one of the guestrooms, thinking that it was most likely to be Larcos. You knew your sis by now would kick Larcos out. "DRACO PLEASE... I'M SORRY!" your were crying hard on your carpet as you held yourself in a little ball not being able to control your tremors. You heard the door creak from upstairs, guessing it was your parents coming to "rescue" you but it was the door to the guestroom "Lil?". You looked up seeing it was Draco, he came running to you "what are you doing?" "Draco's what's-" you see Larcos coming out from another guestroom rubbing his eyes from the light that shone from Draco's room. "Nothing, you twit, go away" you grabbed Draco quickly as if he were about to slip off an icy curb or something. You held hi tightly as you brought yourself on to him crying into his chest, holding on for dear life. "I didn't mean it, I didn't mean anything!" Draco moved your hair away, and kissed your sweaty forehead. "I know" you shook your head "I'M SORRY!" "shh.." he rubbed your back "I know, okay?" he rubbed your back... "Draco don't leave, please!" he nodded "I won't, I'd never leave you specially now" he kissed your head again, rocking you back and forth calming you down... "Draco..." "shh, I'm right here" *Draco... my Draco*
FINALLY I GET TO TAKE MY NAP!
There's my part 86!... took me awhile but got it out at least! Oh and sorry for if this one sucked, I am literally dead tired, so if there are spelling mistakes... my bad, but goodnight, maybe later I'll fix it up, how knows. Night!