Goldilocks and The Three Bears - Modern Version

Little story about goldilocks in 21st century

Created by spaceman619 on Monday, November 20, 2006


A long time ago, in a kingdom far, far away, there was a large house in a leafy suburb. This house belonged to a family of Bears. One day, Mummy Bear made a super-fatty-fry-up. She put some on to Daddy Bear’s plate, and some on to Baby Bear’s plate, and some on to hers. They sat down and started to eat.

“This is too hot!” they all exclaimed. They decided to go for a walk while it cooled down. So they all put on their shoes, and walked out, not forgetting to pick up their iPods on the way and lock the door tightly. They did not see a small girl in a hoodie, waiting just behind a tree. Her name was Goldilocks.
As soon as she had seen them turn the corner. She darted over to the electric gate. She had watched Daddy Bear put the combination in and tapped it in casually. She calmly walked over to the door, and kicked a hole in it, large enough so that she could scramble in. She found herself in the kitchen, walked over to the fry-ups and looked at them, hungrily. She picked some up from Daddy Bear’s plate and ate it.
“Too salty!” she cried
She tried some from Mummy Bear’s plate
“Too sweet!” she exclaimed
She tried some of Baby Bear’s
“Just right!” she said, and ate it all, ravenously.
Next, she moved into the lounge, taking Daddy Bear’s wallet with her.
In the lounge, she found three chairs, arranged around a 42” Plasma Screen TV. She sat on Daddy Bear’s chair.
“Too hard!” she shouted
She sat on Mummy Bear’s chair
“Too soft!” she screamed
She sat on Baby Bear’s chair
“Just right” she said. She got up, turned the TV on and started watching all of the Bear’s Coronation Street and Eastenders tapes. Soon she became bored and decided to pick the paint off Baby Bear’s chair. Soon all of the sparkling paint had been picked off, and lay in piles around the chair! She became more bored until she decided that she would go upstairs and see what she could steal. She walked up the stairs and found many beautiful pictures. She walked in to Mummy and Daddy Bear’s room. She lay down on Daddy Bear’s bed.
“Too saggy!” she yelled
She lay down on Mummy Bear’s bed
“Too lumpy!” she shrieked.
She went along the corridor to find Baby Bear’s bedroom, picking up the large ring and watch that lay on the sideboard. Soon, she found it.
She lay down on his bed
“Just right.” She said, and fell asleep!
Soon, the three Bears came home from their walk, and were shocked to find the gate open and a large hole in the door! They crept in, careful not to disturb the person who had broken in, if there was a person still there. They spotted Baby Bear’s empty plate and began to wonder what else had gone. They walked past a table and Daddy Bear spotted that his wallet was missing. He was stood there puzzled when he heard a gasp from the living room. He rushed inside to see Baby Bear’s chair with all of the paint scattered in piles around it. Daddy Bear became very angry. He rushed upstairs and into his room to find all of the covers strewn around dashed into Baby Bear’s room and…
Goldilocks woke up, staring into the face of a very angry bear.
“Get out now, before I rip your head of with my sharpest claw!” he yelled, ferociously.
Goldilocks was too frightened to move. Daddy Bear lifted his clawed hand, and… brought it down with a crash on the empty bed.
“AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!” screamed Goldilocks as she ran out of the door, down the stairs, out through the hole that she left earlier, and straight into the path of an oncoming police car.
She was in hospital for three weeks and was later charged with breaking and entering and theft. She served two years of community service and was later up to her tricks again.
Daddy bear was given a 20-year prison sentence for attempted murder and is still there now.

The moral of the story is: Don’t break in to people’s houses, and don’t run into the road in front of police cars.

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