I opened my eyes to see my girlfriend sitting next to me on my bed.
"Dallas, what are you doing here?"
"Come on; I want to show you something."
"Let me use the bathroom first."
She nodded, and I walked quietly across the dark hallway. After I'd shut the door, I looked at my watch; the time didn't shock me. Dallas always woke me up at the same time, mainly by calling me and telling me to get online or talk her out of her latest crazy idea. I stared in the mirror before brushing my teeth and then went back into the bedroom. Dallas was sitting at my computer desk, looking at photos of her I'd saved to my hardrive.
"You really need to get rid of this one," she murmured when she noticed I was in the room.
"You're beautiful," I replied softly, standing behind her.
She turned in my chair, rolled her eyes, and grabbed my hand as she stood. She led me to the window, crawling through before I did, and then we got into my car. I started it up, quickly driving away, and she giggled.
"I love when you're bad," she whispered in my ear before scooting back towards the door, resting her head against the window as she gave me directions; she stared at me.
"What?" I asked as I pulled onto a different road.
"Don't you ever get tired of me?"
"No. You're my girlfriend. The only thing I get tired of is you insulting yourself, saying you're not beautiful. You're gorgeous."
"You're such a sweetie," she responded, her voice almost inaudible, and she stared out the window.
As soon as I'd stopped, she got out of the car. I followed her and she took my hand in hers.
"There's something I need to tell you."
"What's that?"
"I love you."
"I love you, too."
"Let's keep driving."
On the road, she kept up a steady stream of chatter, stopping when the car came to a stop; I glanced at the gas gauge that read empty. We began walking to the nearest gas station. As we made our way down the dark highway, she kept her hand in mine, her body so close; I glanced at her.
"Cold?"
"No."
"Alright. HEre's my jacket anyway."
She shrugged into it, keep her face away from me.
"Dal, what's wrong?"
"I can't do this. You've been the greatest boyfriend I've ever had, and I mean ever. I truly do love you, but I hate you at the same time."
"Why?"
"No; forget I said anything. There's the gast station."
At the station, I bough a small gas can and filled it with fuel. Dallas came out from the main building, wearing huge neon pink sunglasses. I laughed, and she posed.
"Not right now. I'm off to dine with my husband, Robert."
"Robert?"
"Duh, of the Cure."
"He'd be one lucky guy."
"I know. Wouldn't he be?"
We went back to the car, the sun beginning to climb onto the horizon. I drove her back to her house, and she hesitated before getting out.
"Get online. I'll be waiting."
She ran to the front door, and I made my way home.
hxckickass: hey.
onceuponatime: listen- I was telling the truth earlier. I absolutely love you, but I hate you. I have to break up with you.
hxckickass: why?
onceuponatime: come to my house as soon as my mom calls okay? You'll know then.
onceuponatime has logged off
I answered the phone when it rang that afternoon. It was Dallas' mom.
"Please come over."
"I'll be right there."
I drove fifteen miles an hour over the speed limit and soon reached my girlfriend's house. Her mother hugged me immediately after I'd gotten out of my car.
"What's going on?" I asked.
"Go on up."
I climbed the stairs to Dallas' room. When I pushed open the door, I collapsed. There, lying on the bed, was Dallas, eyes closed, skin pale. Empty pill bottles lie on the floor around the bed, and I knew then; I comprehended.Dallas had killed herself. Her mom handed me a piece of paper, and I opened it. It took a few times of reading it for it to sink in.
These days I can't help but wonder why
I love you. You've done nothing but care for me since we got together. But I hate you for the same reason. You gave me the benefit of a doubt. You gave me a chance when everyone had given up. You made it difficult for me to feel unloved in your presence. You never let me believeI wasn't good enough. You're not at fault for this. I've been wanting to do this since I found out I was adopted. Yeah, you never knew. I never told you, because then you'd make me believe it was my parents' faults; their loss, right? Now you see why I broke up with you at exactly 6:03. You deserve better than me. You deserve someone with less emotional baggage.
I love you, Pierre. I love you and always will.
Love, Dallas
Your lonestar
I stick to my illusions to carry on
There you have it. Please seriously rate; that's all I care about.
