Part III ~ All the Small Things
Waiting for Vicky to announce the first band I wondered if the guys were worried about me but dismissed the thought. After Shawn had barely saved me one evening from none other than Pete, my half-brother, who had found out about my whereabouts, he had made me take some self-defence classes. By now I could pack quite a punch and my kicks weren't too bad either.
Nope, they wouldn't worry, too much.
"Good evening guys!" Vicky's rusty voice piped up suddenly and I made my way inside to search for my band and get them ready. Not that they couldn't dress themselves or anything like that but... they still were like helpless little boys, with a knack for cussing, drinking too much, flirting with the wrong chicks and basically not able to live their lives on their own.
"Bella! Bella!", I winced when Vicky screeched my name into the mic, waving from the small stage, "Kai's getting married!". I smiled at the fifty year old jumping up and down the stage, waving back at her but other than that ignored her and hoped she'd continue with the announcement. People were already pointing at me, those that I knew closer smiled knowingly.
"Right, right! Well, tonight we have just a fine line-up, first goes a band that already played once here, they're from California and just visiting NY, "Phantom Planet"!", the small crowd cheered, "Then our favourite girls only band rocks the house: "Kiss & Kill"!", again the people cheered and as I reached our table and plopped down next to Jesse again, just smiling at their questioning glances.
"Third up is a new band, they're from New Jersey," I swallowed hard, third up meant they were last before us, ""Pencey Prep"!", I heard several girl screeching loudly and guessed that Frank and his band were more well-known in NJ when they had fangirls.
"Last up this night is a band that's grown quite famous in the underground, or wouldn't you agree?" Vicky asked the audience and they cheered loudly, of course knowing who she was talking about.
""With a Vengeance"?" I heard her ask in shock, "No, no! You guys totally got that wrong!".
I laughed at her mindf*cking the audience.
"Aww, hell... you know I'm joking, people, "With a Vengeance" is up last!"
The loud roar of the crowd made me shiver in pleasure - this was life, it was perfect!
The five of us sat in our booth, comfortable with just listening to "Phantom Planet" and "Kiss & Kill" while drinking and smoking. Each of the guys had tried at least once to ask me about Frank but I always declined to answer.
When Gabby, lead-singer of "Kiss & Kill, announced their last song, we got up in unison. It was a shame I wouldn't get to see Frank and his band on stage but we really needed to get our stuff out of the basement, where we usually practiced.
Pushing past the cheering crowd towards backstage, we narrowly cut in before the girls coming from off the stage and where heading straight towards a massive, red door at the back of the small area, when a voice made me stop.
"Looks like a fangirl to me!", I turned to see Frank, the smirk not leaving his lips. Feeling Dan, who was right beside me, tense up, I gazed at him and nodded towards our destination.
"Let me handle him!", Dan nodded in reply but I noted that his fists had curled up tightly.
When the guys were gone I looked back at Frank who ignored the calls of his band mates to get his butt out on stage. Staring at him intently, I wondered when he had gotten his lip pierced.
"So, whatcha saying, groupie, how about a blow-job after I'm done here!" he sneered, "You were always rather good with those!".
"Sorry!", I shook my head politely before smiling, "When you're done here, I am by far!"
Turning on my heel I went downstairs to find my band moving our stuff around but stopping in mid-track when they saw me.
"Who is that guy?" Dan asked me and I buried my hands in the pocket of the leather jacket I was still wearing, knowing I'd have to tell them now.
"He's my ex-boyfriend.", I mumbled, listening to their gasps.
Suspicious, Dan closed in on me, making me back away a little, "What did he want?", he was seething, the others glancing at them in fear. Dan always had been the one with the temper, a wonder really that he wasn't playing the lead guitar, it would have fit his badass attitude.
Stumbling with the words, as the furious man advanced on me, I stuttered, "A... a... blow-job.", before slapping my hands over my mouth, staring at the all around shocked guys.
"What?" Dan asked weakly and my anger rose.
"Oh, goddamn it! He wanted to f*ck with me, okay? If you're thinking of doing anything to him I'll castrate you, Dan, got it? Cause you getting the shit beaten out of your bony self is the f*ckng last thing we need!"
Growling I grabbed the closest thing to take it upstairs with me before leaving quickly. Let them do the rest of the work all alone I thought.
Leaving what I'd fetched right on a table close by as I got up I heard to the music blaring and stopped dead in my tracks, listening for a moment.
When I finally closed the door behind me I leaned against it for a moment to catch my breath, before turning to where the sinks and mirrors where.
A memory flashed up, a night in mid September, mom and dad had been fighting again, dad left to get drunk, when the loud noises had subsided I had looked in the mirror to find my face tear stained and smudged.
Shaking my head to stop the memory from taking me over I closed in on the mirror, thankful that not a single person was currently in the bathroom.
Running my fingertips over my face, I sighed.
I had changed, now I saw, it was all for the better, it was my life and when it might have hurt Frank back then it had been better for the both of us: look at where we were now.
Smiling coldly, remembering what my father had always used to tell me about girls being useless, I didn't even realize what I was doing before sharp pain shot through my whole body as the mirror shattered under the impact of my fist.
Blood splashed and I heard a high-pitched scream behind me.
Turning I found it to be a young woman that seemed somewhat familiar to me.
"Oh Jenna!", I grinned at the girl who had used to be my friend before I'd dated Frank in high school, "Wouldn't have pictured you as a groupie!" and walked out the door, leaving her in hysterics.
Crossing the room again, it was an all-too familiar voice that brought me out of my trance, "
"I'm sorry to announce our last song for tonight, New York! We've all been looking forward to this evening because we've always wanted to play here in NY," the people cheered, "yeah, well it's true!", the chuckle that followed the statement made me shiver, "However, there's another band coming up after us and we've been wanting to see them live ever since we got our hands on their first EP. They're another reason we're here tonight!"
I smirked, thinking that they truly had no idea who WaV really was. Gazing at the stage, I was surprised as I found Frank's eyes right upon me, seizing me up, as he'd pushed his guitar on his back and was holding the mic in his hands. Shaking off the weird feeling, I hurried off towards backstage again.
"What the hell happened to you?", Dan's gruff voice caught me off-guard.
"Nothing, just smashing some mirrors, the usual, you know!", I took of Gerard's leather jacket, noting that some bloodstains had found their way on it. Either he'd think it gross or he'd love it I thought, once again saddened that he couldn't be here this evening because of some stupid project for art school.
My fitting, washed out jeans was ripped in several places revealing bare skin beneath, the converse I wore looked like another art exhibition of Gerard's but the white shirt I'd been wearing worried me the most: the blood had soaked into it and my right hand was still pouring the red liquid.
"Come here!", Dan walked up to me as the others continued looking on, "Take that off!", he instructed me and I lifted the shirt over my head, now only in my black bra.
Dan ripped the shirt in pieces and began to bandage up my right, as I noticed that luckily the tattoo had not gotten a scratch.
"What does that mean?" the boy leaning over my hand asked lightly and I knew he was sorry about earlier. Smiling, I looked at the intricate letter. Just one single letter really: F!
"You don't want to know, Dan!" I hoped he wouldnt question further but was satisfied when he simply nodded his head before finishing the wrapping.
"I need a t-shirt or something like that, guys, I can't walk around like this!", I piped up, padding Dan's shoulder in thanks.
"I don't see why you got to cover that up, Jesse smiled in my direction and suddenly the tense atmosphere turned normal again, as we all laughed.
"Fine!", I smirked, feeling competitive, "But you'll have to take of your shirts, too! Let's have a tattoo parade!"
"That's a deal!" Shawn grinned at me before his eyes suddenly turned into slits.
Looking behind me I found, of course who else but the members of "Peincy Prep" staring at us incredulously. Was I imagining things or did Frank look worried.
A t-shirt was suddenly tossed at me and I saw Dan walking off to the front bare-chested, not saying a single thing and heeding my warning from earlier. Shrugging, I put on the black wife-beater, having quite a fight with my breasts about if or if not they fit inside of that thing.
By that time the guys from the other band had put their stuff away, Jesse, Shawn and Jeremy had gone to find Dan and I heard Vicky on stage rambling about what a great evening it had been and what an even better night it would be.
Fetching up Gee's jacket once more I searched through the pockets for my cigarettes and when I found them lit one up before sitting down on the only table around here, waiting for the guys to come and fetch me.
All the time I was aware of his eyes upon me, watching me closely and to be honest it was the first time in two years that I felt wanted again, even though, I was sure he was not interested in me anymore.
"You reconsidered, or what?" a smooth voice suddenly sounded right next to me and I looked up to find Frank staring down at me, his tongue playing teasingly with his lip ring.
"What?"
"That blow-job!" he smirked.
"Then why are you still sticking around here in the back. "Without a Vengeance" are up anytime now." he looked at me blankly and sat next to me as I watched his band colleagues leave to the front.
"I'm waiting!"
"What for?" he pried but this time I merely shrugged, glancing at him when he sighed, to find his eyes were on my wounded right hand.
"I saw you down there when we were playing, you were crying again!", he snatched the pack of cigarettes out of my hands just like two years ago.
"So, I was!" coldly I grabbed it back when he'd fetched out of it a cig, to receive another smirk.
"You've grown cocky!", I snapped.
"So, I have!" he countered, "And you like it!"
I didn't even deny that he still had an effect on me but continued to stare ahead, listening to Vicky still babbling on stage.
"Well, personally I'd like to get a look at this band." he suddenly jumped to his feet, "If you're not coming along, I'll be on my way. Maybe that lead singer isn't as opposed to blow-jobs." he smirked once more and made his way outside, me watching his leaving form, shivering slightly.
If only he knew... well he would in a matter of minutes but still.
Grinning to myself, I waited and only too soon I saw the rest of my band strolling back, still discussing this "dude who totally riled up Dan".
"Get ready, Bella!" Jesse called, "Vicky's finishing her speech and there's even more people piling in at the moment."
"Right, I'm all set!" I nodded and jumped up, watching the guys get their stuff.
Dan, still bare-chested grabbed his bass guitar, Shawn and Jesse fetched their guitars, only Jerry merely pulled out his drumsticks from his jeans pockets.
Vicky's voice boomed through the club: "And now guys, here's what you've been waiting for. These guys will rock your fucking socks off your cheese feet,", I winced, ""With a f*cking Vengeance"!".
Piling in our usual group hug we parted the moment she called out our name and walked out. Passing some cheering people on the way to the stage, I put a fist into the air, making them roar in apprehension.
The way up the stage seemed longer than ever as I let my eyes wander across the crowded room, until my eyes met his.
I smirked right into his shocked face, sure that now he knew .
Reaching the mic I grabbed it and turned my attention towards the crowd, still cheering loudly.
"Good night, New York!", they quieted down, "We've had a lot of fun listening to those other bands, but" halting for the effect I smiled at some cheering guys close by, "the most fun still is to stand here, right here in this f*cking place and hear you guys cheer us on!", an uproar started and I waited for a moment before it turned quiet again.
"We fucking love you with all our black hearts can give, you know that?" I roared and felt my eyes drawn to the entrance where Kai's outline was visible in the night as someone came in.
Tommy, accompanied by none other than Gerard; he had made it.
I beamed at the two.
"Well, guys, Vick already blabbed you to death, so I'll quit stalling. We're set up and ready to rock, so let's get this on. The first song tonight will be "All the Small Things" and I expect you to sing along, you do that for me, right?" again my eyes found Frank, still staring at me like I'd grown a second head.
Then I heard myself speaking, the words only meant for the man I had never stopped loving, "This is for you!"
Closing my eyes I let go and felt the music surround me as the other's began playing. Tapping my foot and grabbing the mic tight with both my hands I ripped my eyes open the moment that the first word left my mouth:
All the small things
True care, truth brings
I'll take one lift
Your ride best trip
Always, I know
You'll be at my show
Watching, waiting, commiserating
Say it aint so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
Late night, come home
Work sucks, I know
He left me roses by the stairs
Surprises let me know he cares
Say it aint so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
Say it aint so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
Keep your head still, Ill be your thrill
The night will go on, my little windmill
Say it aint so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
Keep your head still, Ill be your thrill
The night will go on, my little windmill
Behind me the last sounds died out and for the first time in minutes I clearly saw what was right in front of me again as I stopped jumping around stage like crazy: the crowd cheering, Gerard and Tommy who'd fought their way over to where Vicky had been standing. Now those three were basically jumping up and down in glee.
Had it been that good? I wondered but knew that this song had been heartfelt.
Searching for the man that I needed to see most I only saw the outline of a person leaving through the front doors.
This time Frank had left me and I couldn't blame him at all.
Aww... no worries, it'll work out! ;)
Okay, fourth part will be uploaded either on Sunday or on Monday, I'm not sure yet. :) Just watch out!
Maaaaaybe, you wanna give me a clue as to what you think of this part though:::
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