Chapter 7
Male voice, older: "Begin Alpha Recording Session 7."
(Pause)
Female voice, younger: "Greetings. This is Raine Elsie Johnson Bergrenn, here with the continued story of the occupation.
(Pause)
"Well, I believe I had just finished telling you about all the excitation after I had snuck into the west hall of the university and copied all the Ginsanean top secret information and almost gotten caught. It was just insane. Of course, I couldn't sleep a wink that night. Heavens, I was breathing so loudly I'm surprised that I didn't wake anyone."
(Laughter)
"The night passed with surprising quickness as I replayed the night's events over and over in my head. In the morning I got up first and hurried to the bathroom to check the damages. Other than dark circles under my eyes and a few scrapes that clothes would hide, I looked normal. Sleepy, frazzled, and guilty, but normal. I ate quickly and got out of the room as fast as I could, I dreaded the major's piercing eyes more than finding out what was in store for me."
(Pause)
"I walked outside. No soldiers surrounding me, guns aimed, no GSS agents here to arrest me, no blaring sirens and clamoring speakers commanding me to turn myself in. They must not have figured out who I was or what I had done. Albeit shakily, I walked to work as normal. That's when I saw it. On the old grainy television monitors there was an warning flickering at me. It was me; I stared at a drawing of myself. It read: 'Wanted, Dead or Alive, for crimes against Ginsanean Nat'l Security.' Then it gave a description of me, name, unknown; age, 18-26; height, approx. 5'8"; weight, approx. 130; hair, brunette; and eyes, brown. Finally, in small print: 'If spotted contact your local GSS agent. Caution suspect may be armed and dangerous.'"
(Pause)
"I was shocked. Instinct made me move, so that I wouldn't be caught gaping and, as I walked by the next monitor, indignation set in. Armed and dangerous? Who were they kidding? I punched a guy in the nose and ran like a scared rabbit and suddenly I was some kind of threat. And honestly I looked nothing like the picture. My mouth was nowhere near that full, my chin was more oval, my nose not that flat, my eyes larger, and my eyebrows were straighter. I guess none of them had gotten a good look at me. That girl hadn't recognized me or some patriotic pride had showed it self and she hadn't turned me in. And the ears were too round. It was all off."
(Pause)
"Sighing, I felt better; not great, but better. And the picture was so grainy anyways. But what was that bit about being wanted dead or alive. That caused fear to tighten in my throat, but I swallowed it down. Did they honestly think any Firmsladians would turn me in? As long as I kept my head down for a few weeks, this whole thing would blow over. I could only hope that no one would recognize me from the picture and that they hadn't found out about my break in and that the major and Bram had really been asleep. There was nothing else I could do."
(Pause)
"When I'd finally scurried my way to the hospital, Petr met me out back. 'Raine!' he enthused. 'You were wonderful, we got so much information – all top secret too! You won't believe how much this is going to help the resistence.'
I couldn't help getting excited at his infectious enthusiasm, but I was still apprehensive. 'Well, I'm glad, but, honestly, have you seen the wanted posters?'
'Oh, that looks nothing like you. I'm amazed you got everything that you did – schedules, lists of troops, spies, maps of determent camps, power grids....'
He would have gone on ad infinitum, but I hurriedly interrupted him, 'yes, I know, Petr! But they're gonna get me! Someone is bound to have recognized me – I'm not exactly a nobody – and they'll put two and two together and.... did you really see the posters? Dead or alive?'
He grabbed my shoulders, trying to stop my growing hysterics, 'Raine it was dark, you were wearing the black outfit, weren't you, no one will recognize you. Don't worry – celebrate!'"
(Pause)
"I tried to smile, but I was still to freaked. 'So, Raine,' he asked, 'armed and dangerous? What exactly did you do?'
'Punched a love-drunk soldier in the nose and ran like the wind.' He laughed and I had to grin back. However, I was shaken up. 'I didn't like it, not having a way to...to... defend myself.'
Petr became serious (as usual) and nodded, 'yeah, I'll get you a gun.' That wasn't exactly what I expected!"
(Laughter)
"'Hang on, Petr, they're no way I can use or even hide a gun. It would be crazy to even think...'
'I don't have one now, but I'll find something for you. You're right, you know? Raine, you need to be able to defend yourself in the future.' It was a question, really. Was I going to continue helping the resistence after last night's scare?
I sighed; of course, I was. 'Alright, but not a gun. I couldn't kill someone.'
'You or them? I think you'd find away,' Petr said with a twisted, pained smile.
I shrugged. Maybe."
(Pause)
"'Well, if not a gun (not yet) I'll get you a good knife and, at least, let me show you how to shoot one in case you ever need to.' I frowned, but nodded in agreement. From beneath his coat he pulled a pistol from a holster under his arm against his side. Yikes – no idea that was there. Swiftly, just like in the movies, he pulled the clip out and emptied the chamber of its round dropping both in a pocket. Causally, 'here, take it, Raine,' and he passed it into my unwilling hands. It was heavy and cold. Now, I wasn't totally without gun experience – BB guns and paintball guns count, right? He spent a few minutes showing me how to hold it and aim. Then he let me practice loading it, but, obviously, wouldn't let me fire. It wasn't all that hard, but it would be, without a doubt, much more difficult pointing it toward an enemy and squeezing (not pulling) the trigger."
(Pause)
"'Next the double-barreled shotgun.' Woah. Don't tell me he had a shotgun hidden away somewhere, oh, wait, yes, strapped to his belt on the other side. Must have been hard to sit. Good thing that coat was large. Hold on, I'm babbling to myself and missing everything. He showed me how to unload and reload – deceptively simple. 'Now, the soldiers have the new tactical rifles, so they won't have to reload anything. But I like the old guns better, they don't require a password to operate. And they're always shocking everyone, not that I mind, but shocking people is no way to win a battle. Anyway,' he handed me the shotgun.'"
(Pause)
"I lifted the shotgun to my shoulder and looked down the barrels, felt kinda cool. 'No, Raine, you're doing it all wrong!' said Petr, frustrated. I lowered it, confused. 'Hold it like this,' he gave a pantomime of holding it to his shoulder and I tried to follow. 'No, here,' he went around behind me and placed his hands on mine. 'This hand here and this one here, now pull it back into your shoulder.' He was standing right behind me, but I hardly noticed, so deep was my concentration. 'Pull it back hard, it gives off a good kick. You'll bruise, but you won't break your shoulder if you hold it firmly.' Gracious, he was holding me firmly. I flushed and prayed he didn't feel it radiating off of me. That was the first time I had been close to a guy in... well, since before I had gotten married."
(Pause)
"Right now, I needed to focus though. Petr, blithely went on, 'now tilt your head, yeah like that, and look down the barrel of the shotgun.' He cheek was pressed against my ear, I must have felt like I had a fever. 'Now point the thing at whatever your aiming at and squeeze one trigger then the other if you miss it. And there you have it – one dead bad guy.' He was still holding on, arms wrapped around me and I heard his breath catch right next to my ear and he jerked away. I lowered the rifle and turned. 'That was good, Raine. I think you've got it.' He took the rifle, 'now you'll at least have the general idea.'
Neither of us was making eye contact. An awkward moment passed, then, I said cheerfully, 'thanks, Petr. Now I'll be ready. Watch out Ginsanea!' He chuckled and we talked for a few more minutes and he left. As I walked into the hospital I shook off the embarrassment and even managed to laugh at myself."
(Pause)
"The day passed as normal, but I was distracted this time by the knowledge I now possessed. I was feeling full of trepidations as I thought of Petr trying to teach me to use a knife. Dr. Kurtz sent me home early and I spent the afternoon not doing much of anything, I was too troubled. However, when everyone came home I pushed it all away and forgot about it as much as possible. I would just have to think about it at some other time."
(Pause)
"After dinner, Celene and I went into the lounge hoping to meet the other girls. Helga and Eliza were sitting out there and we happily joined them. As we sat there talking and teasing each other, I wondered if they knew anything about the resistence. I couldn't think of a way to just ask them, but certainly we could all work to help now that everything was getting so organized. I'd have to ask Petr, I would vouch for all five of my friends; I trusted them. Helga said that both her and Uma's husbands worked for the secret police, which was separate from the GSS and controlled by the army. Surely, they could get valuable information about raids and the like. Celene's and Jeina's worked somehow in the military, just regular duties, they supposed. Eliza's husband was an information's officer and that could be useful. Jeina worked in the east hall as a secretary, surely she could find information. Eliza and Uma, as well as Celene, worked downtown and could be used to pass messages. Helga worked right in the main military headquarters, as a personal assistant to a general. That would come in handy."
(Pause)
"As I sat there it all seemed so perfect. I had it all planned out, I just had to talk to Petr about it. We were going to be huge help to the resistence. I was so excited, but with months of practice, I was able to keep my face neutral. I didn't even look up guiltily as Eliza's husband, Burke Jaegar came and got the other two. He said that he was sorry, but he needed his wife and Helga. He was nice... too bad he was the enemy."
(Pause)
"Celene and I sat there a few minutes longer, chatting somewhat awkwardly. I pushed down feelings of asking her to join the resistence, for I really needed to ask Petr first. The next morning, I put my hair in a braid in a hopeful attempt to look even more different from the wanted posters. The more I thought about it the less it made sense; all I had done was punched a guy and ran from the soldiers. Surely, people were doing things like that even worse and I didn't see their wanted posters. Maybe it was because I was found outside the headquarters building or something. I didn't like not knowing. I found Petr, he had been waiting for me. I greeted him as if nothing had happened, and really, nothing had happened."
(Pause)
"He looked as if he wanted to say something, but changed his mind, which I was very glad for, 'do you have anything to report?' Formal as always. 'I haven't heard anything, but I was wondering... do you think we could get my friends involved in the resistence? I trust them absolutely and I really think that they could be a big help. They're either in good positions or could pass along information and we're all married to officers, that would help, and....' Here he stopped my rush of words, 'hang on, Raine, we need to talk about this. We just can't rush into this blindly.' 'Alright,' I nodded. 'Now tell me everything about them, one at a time.'"
(Pause)
"I took a deep breath. 'Well, first there's Celene, she's my roommate, she's married to First Lieutenant Bram Ludvig. She works at a bakery downtown where she already hears a lot of gossip. Um, she's short, blonde, green eyes. She might fit in well with them.' Bram nodded, writing down this information, in code, I noticed. 'Uma's married to Captain Gareth Koen, he works for the secret police. She's got red hair and green eyes, very dramatic. Her roommate is Jeina who's married to Second Lieutenant Fritz Kach, I don't know much about him. She's brunette with blue eyes, I know she would love to help. Oh yeah, she's a secretary in the east wing. Then there's Helga, who's husband is First Lieutenant Berg Ellard, he works for the secret police. Helga works for one of the generals, that could be really helpful, right? She's blonde with brown eyes, she could fit in too. Finally, Eliza is married to Second Lieutenant Burke Jaeger, he's works with information hq. She has black eyes and hair. I trust all of them explicitly.'"
(Pause)
"Petr finished writing before he looked up. 'Sounds good, Raine, I check them all out. Oh and Eliza, she already works with us.' I was shocked, 'what? I had no idea that Eliza... she kept it hidden well.' 'So have you; I won't tell her yet, but if the council of the resistence agrees, having you six work together would be very beneficial. We haven't had the resources to look into this earlier. I'm glad you brought it up. Well, now for something else.' Out of a pocket, he fished a knife inclosed in a leather sheath with a strap and handed it unceremoniously to me. I took it reverently and pulled it out. I was longer than a dinner knife, about nine inches long and thicker. It was slightly curved with a plain metal handle. It was sharp; I could tell without touching the blade. It was old and scratched, but it had been well looked after – the blade was polished to a high sheen. I was proud to have it."
(Pause)
"I knew Petr appreciated my gratitude. He spent the next hour showing me how to hold it, various ways to use it, and how to hide it. It fit nicely down my boot, that I had taken to wearing. Afterwards, he asked me about another mission. I quickly agreed, all earlier fears of being revealed forgotten. It was to be in several weeks, so he wouldn't tell me much about it, but I understood it was to be some sort of sabotage. I confess that as I walked home, I was trembling with excitement."
(Pause)
"That's good for now, right? I'll see you tomorrow."
Male voice: "End Alpha Recording Session 7."
