Mikey Way- The Trick Is To Keep Breathing - Seven

"I'd like to talk about your brother today."

Michael's eyes shoot open to stare at Dr Headlam, discombobulated. "How did you know about my brother-"

"Gerard."

"Yes, but how did you know I even have a brother? I've never mentioned him."

She shuffles the pages in Michael's manila folder. "He called me yesterday."

Oh fuck. "He did?"

"Yes ... Why didn't you tell me about the terminal illness?"

"I ... I didn't think it was important."

"I can help you cope with it."

"I'm sure you could."

She shuffles the papers one more time before closing the folder altogether, clasping her hands together and leaning forward in her seat toward him. "So, how are you coping with it so far?"

"Fine."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." There is a pause, during which Dr Headlam sighs and Michael lies back on the couch again. Once his eyes are shut again, he speaks. "What did Gerard tell you?"

"He told me about the diagnosis and the group therapy, and he also asked me to keep him informed on your progress. I told him that I can't because of patient confidentiality but if there is ever anything you wanted him to know, I could tell him for you." Michael relaxes and nods. "He seems like he really cares alot about you, Michael, which I think is very important for someone in your ... situation. Are you two close?"

Michael smiles. "We used to be. Back in high school we were practically inseparable but the week after Mum and Dad's funeral, his acceptance letter into an art school arrived and he moved to New York, and then to L.A. He called every Friday - sometimes every second Friday because money was usually tight for him - but it wasn't the same."

"How is it having him living with you at the moment?"

"It's okay, I guess. It's a bit weird, though. I mean, it's just that I've been living alone for so long."

"Do you feel as if he's invading your personal space?"

Well, apart from his calling my shrink to check up on me ... "No, it's nothing like that. It's just that before he came to live with me, everything in my life was structured and routine. Now I have someone to spend time with, which is odd because I'm not just sitting there, thinking about things. The other day I came back from a group session and he was cooking, like, an actual dinner not just one of those microwave meals for one that I used to get ... It's different."

"Different?"

"And nice, I guess... Yeah, it is nice having him back. Even though he always stands over me to make sure I eat, and never cleans up after himself in the bathroom, and never shuts up during Stargate, it's nice to finally have someone there just to say "Hey Mikey, how was your day?". I missed him alot."

When Michael returns from Dr Headlam's office, Gerard is lying upside down in one of the armchairs in the lounge room, the remote resting on his stomach, and a novel and half-empty coffee cup on the floor somewhere near his head. Michael shakes his head at his older brother's anomalous behaviour and Gerard smiles sheepishly up at him.

"I took my shoes off this time." Michael looks to where he is pointing and rolls his eyes but doesn't say anything because at least it's an improvement. When he takes a seat on the couch next to the armchair, Gerard rights himself and looks over at him. "Hi."

"Hi. How was your day?" Michael asks politely even though he has a fair idea of what the answer will be. Gerard has regretted applying for the position at the cinema ever since his first day working there because alot of the people they'd gone to school with still lived in the area and frequented the theatre and Gerard disliked the apparently constant questions about their parents.

"Shit, as usual. How was the appointment?"

Michael considers confronting him about calling Dr Headlam to check up on him but decides not to. "It was okay," he answers, shrugging.

"Okay ... Oh hey, did you go to that cafe you've been going to alot lately?"

"Sparticus? No. Why?"

"Well, some girl -uh, a Rachel- called here and asked for you. I told her that you were out and asked if she wanted me to tell you to call her back but she said no because she'd probably see you at Sparticus Cafe. So, you didn't go there on your way home?"

"No..." Michael mumbles, trailing off in a way that indicates he has more to say but really just trying to stall so that Gerard does not press him for details. Apparently, it doesn't work very well.

"So, who is she?"

"She's just a girl I met."

"And you like her?"

"Yeah ... Yeah, I do."

"Have you told her that you like her? I mean, she seems to like you back."

Michael smiles at this comment, hoping his brother is right. "I think she knows how I feel about her already."

"What if she doesn't? You should call her."

Michael looks down at his hand. There is something written there but it is blurry as it has almost been washed off. It's Rachel's phone number and only a couple of numbers are still legible, causing Michael to sigh. He should have written it down some where more permanent subsequent to that day they'd gone to the park together and he'd gotten it off her after walking her to her bus.