The Fake Fortune Teller

umm... yeah... this is what would happen if the Weird Club were to go to a fortune teller i guess

Created by Dreamweaver1313 on Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Jake: *walking through fair* man… I can't believe everyone got separated… *spots fortune telling booth* hmm… looks interesting enough, I wonder if it is a real fortune teller or a fake one… *walks in*

Fortune Teller: hello young sir, would you like to get your fortune told?

Jake: sure, why not?

FT: that'll be 15 dollars in advanced *sticks hand out*

Jake: but your sign says five!

FT: prices change, now fork it over kid

Jake: *glares and slaps money onto FT's hand* fine, there! God! Take all my money why don't you?! I was only given a 20 by Senko! She's tight with money but you know what?! just take it all! I don't care! *throws rest of his money at FT*

FT: … uhh… moving on… *gives odd look before waving hands over crystal ball* hmm… I see a hard life filled with misfortune…

Jake: what kind of misfortune?

FT: horrid ones! Your dog will get run over while chasing the cat who will trip your mother and kill her and then the cat will choke on your goldfish and die along with the goldfish and all your family will die!

Jake: yeah, right, *walks out* my mom's already dead, and I don't own any pets

Dragon: hey Jake! What's up?

Jake: hey, I found a fake fortune teller

Dragon: really? *spots booth and walks in*

FT: hello sir, care to get your fortune told?

Dragon: *walks out* another one to think that I am a guy… *sigh*

Freddy: *walks by* oh, hey Dragon,

Dragon: go to that fortune teller! I want to know your opinion!

Freddy: uhh… ok… *walks in*

FT: fifteen to get your fortune told

Freddy: yeah yeah, here *tosses money onto table*

FT: now let's see… *does hand crystal ball thing, you know what I mean* hmm… you will join the circus as the seven toed freak…

Freddy: *gasp* how did you know I had seven toes on my left foot?!

FT: you do?! *shocked*

Freddy: *bored face* nope, just messing with you, later *walks out*

Jeff: *sees Freddy* hey Freddy, how goes it?

Freddy: dude, go to this fortune teller

Jeff: ok… *does so*

FT: fifteen for a fortune

Jeff: *mutter* so damned expensive *mutter* … *crumples money into little ball and throws it at FT's head*

FT: … *sigh* anyways… *does hand thing* I see a very bright future, you will spend a lot of time with your mother and father,

Jeff: *snort*

FT: what?

Jeff: oh, nothing, continue…

FT: *rolls eyes* you will marry the woman of your dreams and have three kids, after high school you will go to work for your father and-

Jeff: *bursts out laughing* BAHAHAHA!!!

FT: what now!?

Jeff: oh gods! Number one, i'm homosexual, number two, my mom is dead, and number three, I HATE my father!! *walks out laughing*

Bob: *walks up* hello Jeff, how are you?

Jeff: good, very good, did you finish work today?

Bob: yes, and I decided to meet you guys here!

Jeff: hey, go to that fortune teller! I got a good laugh from her!

Bob: all right! *walks in with bloody grin*

FT: fifteen bucks, fortune or not?

Bob: ok, do you have change fro a hundred…?

FT: O.O *looks at Bob* you a whore or something?

Bob: *squints eyes* noo…

FT: what's all the leather for?

Bob: I'll have you know I am wearing it to save my own life! Shadow, Darkness, and Takizi would KILL me!

FT: whatever… *cough* whore*cough*

Bob: just tell my damn fortune!!

FT: *wiked smile* of course! *does hand thing* hmm… you have a grave future…

Bob: tell me something I don't know, I mean, I have a homicidal vampire after me, I have to be an assassin as a job, I have to wear leather a lot, I have a stalker, Captain Queer is in love with me, I am the random person meaning when you punch random person I replace that person, and the list goes on!!

FT: uhh…. *doesn't know what to say*

Bob: T.T I hate my life!!! *goes to corner crying*

FT: *slaps forehead* why did I bother going into this buisiness…?

Spike: *peeks head through* hmm…

Bob: *looks at Spike* Spike, you forgot clothes… again…

Spike: *looks down* so I did!

Bob: *slaps forehead*

FT: O////O uhh… please, sit down sir! I can tell you your fortune!

Spike: *childish grin* OK!!

Bob: no way! *drags Spike out* we gotta get you some clothes

Spike: noo!! I wanna know the future!!

Takizi: hey guys,

Spike: you must go to the fortune teller and get the future!!

Takizi: ok… *walks into fortune tellers place with yawn* tell me the future old hag

FT: well I never! *glares and does hand thing* everyone you know and love will hate you now get out!!

Takizi: ok… *walks out* hey Zeke, go get your forune!

Zeke: why the hell would I do that?

Takizi: I'll send you down to hell if you don't, and I'll give Senko the hate potion again

Zeke: O.O *walks in* ok you old hag, tell me my fortune now!

FT: another one?! You are going to die now beat it!

Zeke: stupid old hag *walks out*

Fred: hey Zeke

Zeke: *ignores Fred*

Fred: *raised brow and notices fortune teller shop* ooo… looks cool… *walks in, pays lady and sits down*

FT: *does hand thing* hmm… your woman will leave you for another man…


Darkness: what is it Fred?

Fred: you aren't going to leave me are you?!

Darkness: no… I don't plan on it…

Fred: good!1 the fortune teller told me you would!

Darkness: I'm going to pay a visit to this fortune teller, the others have complained to me as well… *walks in* hello!!

FT: *smirks thinking: easy target* care to have your fortune told?

Darkness: would i!? *grins and hands money over*

FT: *does hand thing* oh dear… I see death in your future… you are going to die tomorrow…

Darkness: *takes calendar out* oh look! You are right! Tomorrow I AM going to die!! Hehe!!

FT: *gapes* what? how?!

Darkness: dunno… I never know how, I just do, then come back to life! it's something that happens a lot,

FT: have you seen a doctor about that?!

Darkness: nope!! Well, thank you lady! *hugs FT while stealing all money and walks out*

Fred: well?

Darkness: got our money back and then some! *hands money to each*

*later that night after not getting any customers Fortune Teller closes shop*

FT: *sticks hand in pocket* what the- that one! The last one I had! She stole my money! DAMN HER!!

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