Chapter Twenty Six
~Finale~
Something was trying to enter the front of his mind, some sort of alert or alarm. Internal bells were ringing, but in his exhausted state, he’d rather continue sleeping. It just seemed so urgent. His fertile attempt to ignore it failed and the last few inches of unconsciousness left his body.
Joe inhaled tiredly, stretching in place, head buried in his soft pillow. The heartthrob musician would’ve liked nothing more than to stay in bed for eternity, as long as Alex was with him. Her name struck a chord and he slid his arm around the mattress to locate her gorgeous form.
Anxiety sprung up as he felt nothing but empty bed sheets. That wasn’t cool. Joe lifted his head and glanced around, finding no stunning beauty in the room, not if you counted his younger, snoring brother. The elder Jonas was thinking more along the lines of a raven haired female.
One teeny glimpse of the clock had Joseph’s eyes bulging, his breath coming in a huge heap, and his heart rate tripling. It couldn’t be that day already? “Oh crap.”
He leapt out of bed, nearly falling as he raced over to the other sleeping occupant and shaking him awake, “Nick...Nicholas!” The entire bed post shook, banging against the wall as he tried to rouse his sibling.
Nick mumbled groggily, peering at Joe with a sleepy eye, “What, man? It’s early.” Joe was striding to the door, wrenching it open, “Today’s the day and Alex is gone.” The younger Jonas was out of bed in a flash, heading down the hall as Joe dashed down the stairs and out the door.
The still morning air was disrupted by heavy pounding on a seemingly empty house. Joe wasn’t going to give up, “Alex, open the door! Please, let me in!” He persisted, wanting nothing more than to just hold his fiancé and pray he could make everything go away.
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I heard the fist to the front door, but tuned it out as best I could. How he woke up so early after nights of barely any sleep swept past my incomprehensible mind. I couldn’t be near this place, let alone inside it. If only I hadn’t misplaced my wallet.
I almost cried out in relief when I found it wedged between my school books. My head was about ready to rip in two as pain coursed through my body. Every thud of my heart against my ribcage was pure agony. Grief was a fickle and painful ordeal.
Had it really been one year since I miscarried? Lost a part of myself and the heavenly handsome Joseph? Should it have happened? No. Did any of us deserve it? No. Did I wish the baby had survived? I don’t know, which struck me the most; had my throat in a knot.
Was I a monster?
This bedroom, house, neighborhood, town, residents…it was all too much for me to handle on top of the date. So I was running—not forever—but at least for the day. Too many memories were every which way I turned. How could you escape that?
It wasn’t long before the pounding was at the window and I knew I was safe to flee. Thankfully Joseph was quick to try a more evasive maneuver. I hurried downstairs and ran to my car.
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His hand was close to bright red, but he wouldn’t give up. He’d conquer and mourn today with the love of his life. The one thing that had always baffled Joe with Alex was her cryptic hidden emotions. Why did she do the things she did?
He didn’t understand why she was shutting him out when he was dying to be let in. He wanted to be there and hold her, soothe her, kiss her. Anything. His only thought was to be his fiancé’s protector and supporter. Did she not want that? Was he too clingy?
“Alex, please, talk to me! You’re not alone. Whatever you’re feeling, I want to feel with you. Please, don’t shut me out!”
“Joe!” He whipped around and saw Nick leaning out their bedroom window. He pointed towards Alex’s driveway, “She’s leaving!” His head jerked up to the road, where the Volvo was speeding off, not halting at the stop sign. Joe sighed, resting his hands on his knees, “Shit…”
Quickly and not to mention, unsafely, Joe climbed down the side of the garage, jumping halfway when he was going too slowly. He ran, using the years of morning jogs to further his advance to his house. Rationality wanted to fly out the window, but a part of it clung to Joe’s fervent thinking mind.
His brothers were watching him anxiously as he shoved on a pair of jeans after discarding his sleep pants, not bothering with a shirt, through grabbing one of his hoodies while digging his feet into a pair of sneakers. His gaze flickered up to his siblings, eyes wild with determination and worry, “I’m borrowing your car.”
Kevin raised his eyebrow nervously, biting his teeth down with fear of his brothers reaction, “Uh, you can’t drive, Joseph.” The amber color burned ferociously, “I’m taking your car.” The daunting tone was enough to have Kevin back down. He stepped away with Nick as Joe ran past them and outside once more.
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Dawn was breaking and Joe was circling the town, pondering where in Wyckoff Alex would hide. Maybe it wasn’t even in town. Either way, he was screwed. Sirens blared as he ran a red light in a deserted intersection. Yeah, screwed was the right term.
He pulled over and groaned, knowing he was going to be thrown in jail for driving without a license. This was the best day ever. “Joe, that you?” The teen in question looked up and relief swept over his face, “Chief, thank you Lord! Alex is missing. Do you have any idea where she might’ve gone?”
A few expressions ran across the man’s withered skin—shock, surprise, concern—before he could reply, “What?! Why is she…” he trailed off, then sighed heavily, “It’s that day, isn’t it? A whole year’s gone by.”
Joe nodded, his head and shoulders weighing down enormously with grief and sorrow, “Yeah. She drove off a few hours ago and I’ve been trying to find her ever since. You were here last year…would you know where she’d be?”
There was reluctance in the officer’s eyes, but seeing such a crushed, head over heels in love boy at his last strand of hope, Mike gave in, “About a week after she came home and you left,” Joe winced at the mention of his absence, “She couldn’t take being in her house, not that I could blame her. Nina wasn’t any help at all, running her mouth, destroying that girl even more.”
Joe’s temper flared and he balled his fists in his lap. “So, Alex found this bed and breakfast on the outskirts of town, near that outlook point by the forest. My wife had been taking care of her and she was the one who let me know Alex hadn’t returned for a week. Alex told her incase anyone might be looking for her.”
Mike stared at Joe, his one permanent frown softening, “Truthfully, I think she was hoping you’d come back.” The young man gulped and looked at the steering wheel, allowing the honest, blunt truth crush him. He definitely deserved it.
Joe turned to Mike again, tears glistening in his sad eyes, “Please, Chief, I need to find her. She’s not alone anymore and she’s never going to be again. I’ll personally come to you and have you shoot me if I ever leave her.”
Mike sighed once more, stance faltering, “You got a pen and paper?” Joe shook his head, pressing the screen on the consul, “I have a navigational system.” He could’ve sworn he heard Mike mutter, “Dang, fancy contraptions…”
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The Bed and Breakfast was amazing. An undiscovered treasure trove. It was hidden by the forest trees, up on a light incline so the view of lush forestry was spectacular. Joe nearly missed the dirt road that led up to it, almost drifting the tires of Kevin’s BMW.
The structure was similar to an old colonial with a quaint porch, a swinging chair and patio furniture gracing it.
The exterior was all pristinely white and ageless. Roses grew around the perimeter of the house and through the rails like vines. The smell alone was beautiful, but the sight was astounding and breathtaking.
Joe parked next to that oh-so-familiar Volvo and slipped his hoodie on over his sleep tank. He was grateful for having at least some common courtesy in a panicking state. The pebbles crunched under his feet and he jogged up the steps to the screen door, giving a glimpse of the gentle, antique decor.
A sweet elderly woman was sitting behind a desk right next to the door on the inside. She smiled warmly at Joe, “Well, good morning, young man. How can I help you?”
He turned to her slowly, in awe and slightly startled by this fairy tale place. “Um, yes. I’m looking for someone who’s staying here—Alex Nichols. She’s my age with the same hair and blue eyes…”
The woman nodded wisely, wrinkled lips pulling upwards, “You must be the one she’s so in love with. I can tell you feel the same just by your expression. Alex wanted me to kick you out, but she’s hurting and how could she not want to be with you on this day? You’re such a handsome fellow!”
Joe blushed and smiled nervously, “Thank you. What room number is she in?” She rustled around a few desk drawers and produced an old-fashioned key, the one you only read about in earlier century stories. “Room 7.”
Joe smiled appreciatively, “Thank you so much. I’m Joe, by the way.” He held out his hand, which she shook firmly, taking him off guard, “Rose McHanor. Now, get on up there and take care of her.” His chest jumped, but the chuckle could barely be heard, “Thank you again, ma’am.”
He hurried up the stairs across from the door and turned down the right hall. The house was much bigger than it appeared. He found the room easily, facing the back of the Inn and hesitantly placed the key in the lock silently. Joe didn’t move, didn’t breathe; pausing outside the door.
In the early morning silence, he could hear her crying. It just didn’t make any sense why she would run from him, on today of all days. What was going through her mind? Why was she blocking him? It didn’t compute.
Sighing, shoulders sagging as the ominous pain of the significant date pressed down on him, he turned the key, then the doorknob, quietly stepping inside.
The room was open and bright with green carpet, white walls and pale pink bedding gracing the large mattress on one side of the room. A dresser with a small TV was across from the bed, while a couch was beside the door; floral upholstered.
Alex was curled up in an antique chair in the corner, next to a wide window covered in sheer curtains, showing a glimpse of a spacious garden outside. She looked up, eyes red from shedding tears, which still dripped down her sullen cheeks. Joe’s heart squeezed uncomfortably at the pure, untainted, unmasked pain in his love’s despondent eyes.
There was surprise and reluctance in her expression, biting back her tears for the moment, though failing miserably. Joe opened his mouth, not sure what to even say, but felt he had to break the silence. Alex bolted out of the chair and the rockstar, unclear of her motives, shut the door and stood in front of it incase she was going to try and run.
Instead, she slammed into him, pushing his back into the door as her arms flung out to clutch him for support. Alex sobbed into his shirt, knees buckling, “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry, Joe. Please, forgive me!” He held her, arms tight around her waist as she cried endlessly. It felt wonderful to have her against him again though.
It alleviated the pain coursing through his veins.
“Shh, you have nothing to be sorry for, Alex. I’ m the one that’s sorry.” She shook her head and leaned away, her grieving eyes full and watery as she locked them to his, “No. No, this is all my fault. I didn’t do anything. I didn’t try to keep it safe. I wasn’t cautious. The truth is…”
More tears fell as she swallowed, her gorgeous face pained like something had stabbed her, “I wasn’t ready to have a child. I wouldn’t ever put the thought of losing it out there, but what if that’s why I miscarried? I didn’t take responsibility. Maybe if I had seen a doctor, gone for a checkup…then maybe this wouldn’t have happened. I’m a terrible person, Joe. I don’t deserve you, your family, your love—none of it. Please, just let me go and find someone worthy, who won’t go to hell…”
Joe grabbed her face, straining himself to be gentle, and forced his fiancé to look at him. Her eyes were scared, prepared to face his rain of terror. He surprised her by abruptly softening his gaze, “Alex, my love…this isn’t your fault. Not one bit.
“The baby wasn’t growing in the right spot, there was no possible way you could’ve avoided that. I almost lost you. It’ll never go away—this ache and loss of our baby, but having you still here, in my arms, knowing you’re safe and alive, is such a relief. I nearly lost both of you.
“Someday though, Alex, we’ll have another child and we will worship that baby with the love of its first sibling and itself. We won’t ever forget what was taken from us, ok? God had his reasons, no matter how unjust they were. Maybe, since we both weren’t ready, he helped us form such an unbreakable bond—love—by giving us this obstacle.
“And I don’t want to ever hear you say you don’t deserve me. We’re meant for each other and no one else. I’d wait till I was old and gray and totally un-hot for you, though that kinda loses the point of spending our lives together.” Alex laughed weakly, tears still falling as she smiled up at her beloved.
Joe cradled her face more tenderly, eyes glowing and tranquil with devotion, “I’m never leaving you, Alex. Wherever I go, I’m taking you with me, even if you don’t want to. I’m your prisoner, no matter what, but I will make you my slave if I have to. Any way you look at it, you’re stuck with me.”
A real, small smile graced Alex’s beautiful face, “Don’t worry, I love you too much to even attempt to let you go.” Joe grinned, kissing her tears off her cheeks, “Ditto.” She rested into his chest, merging their bodies into perfect alignment, “I’ll follow you anywhere.”
He nuzzled into her neck, their raven hair meshing in same contrast. Joseph kissed the skin behind her ear, feeling Alex shiver, “You’re my everything.” He held her tighter, relishing the reunion with all his heart. They were going to be fine.
5 years later…
I wiped the floor off my cheek and smiled, sighing contently. Life was glorious. I loved every part of it since the pained cracks had been filled. And I grinned when I heard the front door shut and his voice call out for me. “Kitchen!”
I watched, unblinking and unwavering, at the open doorway till he walked through it. His long strides, his awe-inspiring physique, his insanely handsome face shining; along with those cinnamon eyes.
“Evening, wife.” I laughed, allowing his arms to slide and envelope my waist, pulling me into him. I leaned up and kissed his cheek, “That’s so shovenistic, my husband.”
Joe smirked, a glint in his eye, “But it is nighttime and you are, in fact, my wife.” I mock-glared, “Don’t tempt me, Joseph. I’ll make you sleep on the couch.” He chuckled and bent down to capture my lips with his, greeting me properly. And well, let’s face it, to get out of trouble.
My darling beloved—boyfriend for nearly five years, husband for the past three and a half—nuzzled my neck and inhaled, “Mm, you smell like what’s baking.” I threaded my hand through his raven locks, “Casserole?” Joe returned to full stance, “Oh. Never mind.”
I laughed, throwing my arms around his neck, “Still fall for it, love. It is cookies.” He huffed, lifting my legs off the ground, staring me straight in the face, “That’s not very nice, wife.” I stuck my tongue out, “You’re point, husband?”
Opening his mouth to rebut, Joe was interrupted by cooing and clanking beside us. He turned, lips stretching into a grin so large only he had mastered and it sent my heart fluttering, “I didn’t forget about you, my little angel.”
Setting me down, I again observed Joseph as he picked up our almost two year old daughter. She giggled that divine child’s laugh as her daddy raised her above his head, making fun rocket sounds before placing a sloppy, raspberry kiss on her cherub cheek.
Annabelle Jonas joined the family a year after Joe and I had wed. It was a miracle pregnancy. No complications. She marked our quaint family with the third set of raven-colored hair. Needless to say, we had named our daughter after Edgar Allen Poe’s poem.
She was the Jonas’ true joy, being the first grandchild; spoiled rotten with love and attention. Kevin’s wife, Clarissa—the same girl he had become friends with at the local Starbucks—was close to giving birth to their firstborn.
Nick and Mina had just gotten engaged and were planning to wed next summer. Our clan was filling up. Denise couldn’t have been happier with how her boys’ lives had turned out. Frankie was even dating a sweet girl as he started high school.
Joe held Annabelle to his hip, kissing her black waves, “Were you good for mommy, angel?” She nodded enthusiastically, her forming sentences still on the gibberish side. Joe beamed, “That’s my girl.”
This was how I had always wanted my life with Joe to be like. Teenage sweethearts living with our toddler in our old town with frequent trips around the globe. It was the best you could ever concoct when Joe Jonas was your ultimate love.
And just as he had promised me years ago, he never left me behind again.
So...the End!
Thoughts?
- Love, Crazy -
