“Someone please tell me why two highly respected shinobi are sprawled out in the middle of the street in their sleeping bags?” Kujiira Umino looked up at the slowly descending moon in exasperation.
“Because Jiraiya wouldn't let me have an advanced copy of Icha Icha Fantasy.” Kakashi peeked over the edge of his old volume, finally opting to slide it back into his pocket in a disgusted manner. “Besides, you promised you would come.”
“Yeah, but I never said I had to enjoy it.” Kujiira rolled onto her side, sticking her tongue out at her long time friend. “You know Kakashi, the real thing can be much more enjoyable.” She gave a seductive glance the jounin's way.
“True, but I haven't found anybody who is...kinky enough.” Ever the master of keeping his cool, Kakashi easily one upped Kujiira's lustful look with a one liner of his own. He smirked, his eye turning upwards in a joyful manner as he tucked his hands behind his head.
“You do realize we are the only two bakas out here?” No sooner than Kujiira finished her sentence, a bunch of rowdy men lay out their own sleeping bags. Some even went as far as pressing their noses to the glass in an attempt to see the stack of books on the shelf in the darkened store.
“You were saying?” Kakashi looked at the flushed woman from the corner of his eye. He smiled at her agitated state. Kakashi two, Kujiira zero.
“I should have figured you two would be here.” Anko plopped down beside Kujiira, offering a stick of pocky to her.
“Anko! You read Icha Icha too!?” Both Kakashi and Kujiira sat up, shocked expressions on their faces.
“No, no, no! I was dragged here by the ambiguously gay duo.” She pointed behind her with her thumb.
“Oh great.” Kujiira face palmed as Gai and Lee jovially made their way over to the small group.
“Kakashi! First in line! You have beaten me to the punch again! I must devise a better plan to beat you in competition!” Gai sported a nice guy pose with Lee as the shoved their way to the center of the circle and sat down.
“Don't worry Gai-sensei! You shall get him next time!” Lee literally had fire burning in his eyes.
“What? Did you say something?” Of course Kakashi had heard what the two had said, but he purposefully feigned interest.
“Cool as a cucumber! You got me again!” Gai then threw himself into deep conversation with Lee.
“Oh man! Anko, how could you let them drag you here?” Kujiira leaned forward and whispered into her friend's ear.
“I just..lost a bet. Hehe.” Anko blushed and rubbed the back of her head.
“Lost a bet to who?” Kakashi was curious now.
“Tsunade.” Anko looked anywhere but at her friends.
“WHAT!?” Kujiira shouted at the top of her lungs, Kakashi quickly muffling her screams with a well placed hand over her mouth.
“Anko, how in the world did you lose a bet to Tsunade?” Kakashi removed his hand from the now blushing Kujiira.
“I'd rather not get into it.” Anko stuffed another stick of pocky into her mouth so she wouldn't have to answer.
The shopkeeper decided to make his presence known, shuffling into the front room and switching on the lights. Kakashi pulled Kujiira up and dragged her towards the entrance. He threatened his sharingan onto anyone who dare cut him in line, glaring in every which direction, and once satisfied that it wouldn't be attempted, leaned casually against the door frame.
Kujiira frowned. The second the old man had approached the door, keys in hand, a mob of sleazy, drunk, and smelly men had swarmed them, squishing the two of them up agains the glass of the door. She managed to catch a glimpse of Anko, standing a safe distance to the side. To her right, Gai and Lee had oddly enough acquired a spot to themselves. It seemed as if no one wanted to stand to close to a pair of men in green spandex.
“Kakashi, you owe me one.” Kujiira grabbed his arm so she wouldn't lose him in the fray, sending icy daggers at him. Her eyes snapped open in shock when she felt a hand grope her backside.
“Jiraiya has some fine looking fans. Your a kinky one aren't ya?” An old drunk man was the culprit, and he slurred as he spoke. A few other men decided to take interest in the grope fest and were now stretching out greasy paws of their own.
“Oh, I think she is more of the innocent type.” Face pressed firmly to the glass, Kakashi had no idea what was going on and was too caught up in his own Icha Icha fantasy world to take notice.
“THAT IS ENOUGH! IF ONE MORE PERSON GRABS MY ASS THEY ARE DEAD!” For emphasis, Kujiira called on one of her Ranpu no Mizu's and let it shatter over the mens' heads, dousing them in ice cold water. They yelped and instantly backed away. Kujiira could faintly hear Anko laughing in the corner.
…..................................................................................................................................................................
Kujiira walked down the street, flipping through her own copy of Icha Icha Fantasy. Kakashi had purchased her one in a sad attempt of apology. She had accepted it, not being able to stay mad at her friend for long. She landed on a particularly naughty page and smiled evilly to herself as she made her way to said jounin's apartment. He was currently on a C ranked mission with his students, but was expected to return by night fall. As Kujiira thought, he had carelessly left his window ajar.
…..................................................................................................................................................................
Kakashi tiredly trudged into his apartment, dropping his pack on the floor by the entrance. He approached his room and was about to turn the knob when he sensed a presence on the other side. He froze, his face set into a stony expression. Who would be stupid enough to break into his apartment? Kunai ready, he burst through the door, slamming it behind him so the infilrator couldn't escape.
“Hello Kakashi.” Kujiira lowered her voice to a lusty timber as she sauntered out of the attached bathroom.
Kakashi's eyes widened, and if you could see his face, his jaw was on the floor. He let the kunai drop to the ground, meeting his jaw harmoniously. He looked Kujiira up and down, very much liking what he saw. She was wearing a black leather corset, knee-high fishnets, a tiny black thong that by the looks of it was made of satin, and black stilettos that she had just seductively removed and tossed to the floor. What really got him going was that she still had her whip by her side. The third chapter of Icha Icha fantasy suddenly popped into his mind. Kujiira couldn't be planning out that page could she?
“W-Wha-What are you doing?” Kakashi's face turned red as Kujiira approached him.
Kujiira stripped Kakashi of his jounin vest, letting it fall, forgotten, to the floor. She splayed her hands across the expanse of his chest and let them tease their way up to the edge of his mask, massaging his muscles as she went. Kakashi let out a small whimper as she raked her fingers down his chest and used her hips to nudge him towards the bed. She lifted his black shirt up and over his head, taking him even more off guard by taking his mask with it.
“Wait!” Kakashi instinctively grabbed her shoulders and held her at arms length. He let one hand come up to cover his face as he shyly looked to the side. “Don't look.”
That was exactly the reaction that Kujiira had expected. She smiled softly and took his face in her hands, making her face him. She slowly traced his scar with her finger and thought that the man standing in front of her truly was beautiful. He should not be hiding behind that mask. Kujiira raised herself onto her tiptoes, pulling Kakashi into a steamy kiss. She let her tongue trail across his bottom lip, nipping seductively as she went. The man instantly melted into her, wrapping his arm tightly around her waist. She could feel his hardness between them, and the little gasps he was emitting were making her squirm as well. It was time to put her plan into action. She put all of her weight onto Kakashi, toppling him over onto the bed. She pulled back and gave a mischievous grin to the man below her. She unraveled her whip, striking the floor with it. The snap reverberated through out the room, Kakashi stiffening beneath her.
“Did you just give me an order Mr. Hatake?” She lifted his chin with her index finger.
“I...I... What!?” Kakashi's whole body spasmed as Kujiira grabbed him through his pants and struck the whip just by his ear.
“You heard what I said!” She looked at him for an answer, finding him smiling widely up at him. She quirked a brow as he replied.
“Why yes Mrs. Umino, I do believe I did. I'm ready for my punishment now.”
