“So, how do you plan on proposing?” Vicky asked as she tore her gaze away from the diamond earrings that seemed to be calling her name and looked at Gabe. “Do you want to make a big public statement with lots of show? Are you taking her out to dinner?”
Gabe didn’t meet Vicky’s eyes as he answered. “I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about that yet.” He said with his eyes on the sparkling ring his fingers were playing with.
Vicky looked at her friend intently. She tried to measure his mood. He seemed absent and even a little scared.
“Are you scared?” She asked, voicing her concerns.
Gabe kept staring at the ring in his hand. “I don’t know how she will react.” He said. He was almost whispering, as if he was scared to voice his thoughts.
“Are you scared she’ll say no?” Vicky asked. A frown of disbelief covered her face.
“I just want her to be happy!” Gabe finally looked up to meet Vicky’s eyes. He waited for a moment, trying to find the right words. “I’ll do anything in my power to make her happy. But sometimes I wonder if that’s enough. She seems to be happy with me, but she has a hard time showing her emotions, so sometimes I just don’t know.”
Vicky’s expression of disbelief had changed in one of confusion.
“Are you kidding me, Gabe? Are we really both talking about Victoria, your bubbly, sparkling girlfriend… life of every party? She’s the most open person I’ve ever met.” Vicky stated.
Gabe shot a smile in Vicky’s direction. “That’s what everybody thinks.” He said. “That she’s always bubbly and happy. But she just doesn’t show when she’s upset. She’s good at pretending, but she would be just as happy in a corner of the room as she seems to be in the center of attention.”
Gabe stopped talking and looked at Vicky for a moment. “I never told you how we met, did I?” He asked.
“No, you didn’t.” Vicky answered. She smiled at the memory. “Victoria was just there one night. You guys looked content enough, so we never asked any questions.”
The memory made Gabe smile as well. He still vividly remembered how easily his friends had accepted Victoria.
The smile slid of his face again as he took a deep breath and started talking.
“I was at Angels and Kings with Ryland and William that night. It was around two when I decided to go home. I said goodbye to the guys, grabbed my jacket behind the bar and left through the back door.
I was almost at the end of the alley when I heard someone screaming for help. And you know me, off course I turned around and ran in the direction of the noise.”
Vicky grinned. Only Gabe would be stupid enough to run into a dark alley all by himself.
“When I reached the source of the screaming, I saw Victoria being pushed against a wall. Her top was already ripped open and her attacker was trying to unbutton her jeans with one hand while he tried to silence her with the other.
I yelled some profanities at him as I ran closer and pulled the guy away from her. I clearly surprised him and he panicked. He turned around and punched me in the face before running away.
The impact of the punch made me fall over and the next moment her face was hovering above mine and she asked me if I was okay. I had just saved her from a rapist and yet she was the one asking me if I was okay.” Gabe smiled at the memory.
“Even though my eye hurt like hell, I assured her I was fine and told her we needed to get out of there. I gave her my hoodie and took her to that coffee shop across the street of Angels and Kings, the one that always seems to be open.
I asked her how she was feeling and she assured me she was fine and asked the waitress for some ice for my eye. She looked okay and I didn’t want to push it. We started talking and I realised how comfortable I was around her. When we said our goodbyes two hours later, we exchanged phone numbers. I called her the next day and a month later we started dating. She never brought up the events of that first night again.
Four months later I figured we were both ready for the next step. I wanted it to be special, bought candles and everything. It was all going perfect, until I started unbuttoning her shirt. Suddenly she pushed me away and she curled up in a ball and started crying. She totally crashed and kept pushing me away. It took all of my strength to pull her close to me, trying to make her feel safe.”
Vicky stared at Gabe after he stopped talking. She was silent, mouth agape.
“I… Wow… I don’t know what to say, I never knew.” She managed to stutter out.
“Nobody did. She doesn’t want to talk about it.” Gabe said. “She hates to be vulnerable, so she pretends to be confident and strong. And that sometimes makes me wonder if she’s really happy with me. I wonder why she doesn’t just leave, she deserves so much better than a boyfriend who is on tour half of the time. She deserves better than me.” Gabe let out a heavy sigh as he stopped talking.
Despite the situation, despite the shock of what Gabe had just told her, Vicky still had to laugh.
“Are you telling me that Mister Gabe ‘big mouth’ Saporta is being insecure?” She asked. She let out another small laugh.
Gabe looked at her with a small smile on his lips. “Yeah, I guess I so. Let’s call the newspapers!” He said in a sarcastic voice.
“Oh, I’m sorry about the laughing! I’m just not used to you acting like this, Gabe.” Vicky said while rubbing Gabe’s arm in a comforting way. “Besides, you have nothing to worry about. Victoria loves you! And you are the only one who knows about this. You’re the only one she dares to be vulnerable around, that must mean something, right? And I can list at least a dozen other reasons why you two are meant to be!”
Gabe suddenly looked at Vicky as if he just noticed her. He just stared at her for a moment. Then he jumped up from his chair and ran to the store owner. “This is the one! I’ll take it!” He said excited as he handed the owner the ring he had been holding.
The owner smiled and started packing the ring as Vicky approached Gabe with caution.
“Gabe, are you alright?” She asked carefully. His sudden excitement surprised her.
Gabe gave her a toothy grin. “I’m perfect. You just gave me the perfect idea for my proposal!” He exclaimed.
He grabbed the package with the ring from the counter and pulled a credit card out of his wallet and tossed it at Vicky.
“You take care of things here, will you? I have a proposal to prepare!”
He quickly planted a kiss on Vicky’s cheek and stormed out of the store, leaving both Vicky and the owner behind open-mouthed.
-XxX-
When Victoria got home, she found Gabe watching TV. It surprised her to see Gossip Girl playing, but she didn’t ask any questions. By now she was used to Gabe’s unexplained habits.
She made her way to the sofa and crawled into his lap as she gave him a quick peck on the lips. She nuzzled her nose against Gabe’s collarbone as Gabe kissed the top of her head softly. His arms quickly wrapped around her waist.
“Hi, baby. You had a nice day at college?” Gabe asked her.
“It was okay. Until I got in my car and noticed my AC wasn’t working. I need to get that fixed as soon as possible.” Victoria answered.
“So that’s why you reek?” Gabe asked teasingly. It earned him a playful smack on the head.
“Shut up!” Victoria muttered before getting up.
“Where are you going?” Gabe asked in a disappointed voice. His arms fell in his lap as they lost contact with Victoria’s waist.
“I’m going to take a shower! Because unfortunately your rude comment was right and I do smell bad.” Victoria explained.
Gabe smiled at her reaction and grabbed her hand as he got up from the couch as well. “Mind if I join you?” He whispered in her ear in a husky voice.
He was talking in that Spanish accent that sent a pleasant shiver down Victoria’s spine, but she wasn’t going to give in that easily.
“Actually, I do.” She simply stated with a smile. She freed her hand from his and walked to their bedroom. She expected Gabe to follow her in and it surprised her when he didn’t. But again she asked no questions.
It wasn’t until she had the water running and walked back into the bedroom to grab some clean clothes that she noticed the small envelop on the dresser.
Just the sight of it made Victoria smile. Gabe always left her little messages everywhere. Post-its on the fridge, her lipstick on the bathroom mirror or just a simple notebook page on her pillow. Random sentences, lines of poetry, profound quotes or love notes.
Sometimes – like on the small envelop – only a single heart, which Victoria loved the most of all. Because the light impression reminds her of Gabe. The sentiment is all there, not masked with complex words and patterning that she herself tends to hide behind. The line of that single symbol says so much.
Victoria smiled as she picked up the envelop. She could already imagine what the content would look like. She knew exactly how Gabe dotted his i’s and crossed his t’s. Because she kept every single message Gabe ever wrote her. All dated and in a box under their bed. And when Gabe’s away, she’ll read them everyday, just to keep him close.
A list was revealed when Victoria opened the envelop. With a curious frown on her face, she started reading.
One: I can be myself when I'm with you. You love me even with all my faults. You laugh at my silly jokes, no matter how ridiculous they are, just to make me happy. And even when I’m grumpy, you still like me. After three years of dating, you still haven’t gotten tired of me.
Two: You allow yourself to be vulnerable around me and you let me take care of you, even though you hate to the thought of you not being strong enough. I love your openness with me.
Three: You are so beautiful. I love your eyes and your smile. I know you don’t think so, but you look incredibly sexy when you are making breakfast, just wearing one of my shirts and your hair a mess. You’re simply irresistible.
Four: I love the way you kiss me and the softness of your lips against mine. When we kiss my stomach still goes crazy like that first time.
Five: You moved all the way from California to New York just to be with me. Moving here was a big step and you did it anyway. You’ve given up everything you had to be with me.
Six: Waking up next to you and realizing we’ve been hugging all night is the best feeling in the world. The way you look when you are sleeping always makes me smile.
Seven: You have a terrific sense of humor and you’re never boring. I love the way you laugh, the way you make me laugh. A smile from you can chase away all the blues.
Eight: Your idea of a big night out is just the two of us. And your idea of romance is dim light, soft music and just the two of us. I love the way we sometimes stay up all night, cuddle and just talk, then watch the sunrise together.
Nine: You are my inspiration. You’re always on my mind; I just can’t do without you. I love the ways you support me when I’m off track.
Ten: You let me go on tour without complaining, because you believe in me and you want to support me. Your undying faith is what keeps me going. And sometimes you call just because you’re thinking of me. I love the way your voice sounds over the phone. And even though we may be miles apart I still feel like you’re right there with me.
Eleven: You are open to try new things and you have a passion for your hobbies and interests. I love your love for the things that interest me. Like when you learned Spanish, just so you could talk to my grandparents in Uruguay.
Twelve: Even though I’m the one who sings for a living, you are the one singing at the top of your lungs in the shower. I love taking showers together. And your knowledge of and taste in music amazes me every day.
Thirteen: You have seen me at my worst and you still love me. Shitty days are less so whey you’re near and when you hold me tight, everything becomes alright. You know when I’m struggling and help me to trust myself. When I need to cry, you lend me a shoulder and a tissue.
Fourteen: I love the way we finish each other’s sentences. You have the ability to speak without saying a single word. We can glance at each other across the room and know what the other is thinking.
Fifteen: I love the way you treat my friends and how they all love you. You have the ability to make friends wherever we go. You are not scared to show your affection when we are in public.
Sixteen: We can talk about everything or nothing; it’s always okay with you. And when you listen, I know you’re really listening and not just waiting for your turn to talk.
Seventeen: You make me feel like I’ve never felt before. When we say I love you it doesn’t feel overused.
Eighteen: I can see myself grow old with you. When I see you with Bronx, I know I want you to be the mother of my children someday.
Nineteen: You will date this message and keep it in a box under our bed. You kept every single message I ever wrote you. You think I don’t know that you read them every day when I’m gone, but I do.
Twenty: I love you. For who you are and for who I am when I’m around you. We’re a perfect match. Your love gives me the feeling that the best is still ahead.
The list goes on, but these are the first twenty reasons why you should turn around now.
By the time Victoria finished reading the list, the curious frown was replaced by a slightly confused one and a small smile was playing around her lips. She turned around slowly.
The paper dropped to the floor and Victoria’s eyes grew big at the sight in front of her. Her mouth fell open in shock.
Gabe was sitting in front of her on one knee. He grabbed her left hand in both of his hands.
“The list could go on for while longer. But I realised words can just not express how much you mean to me.” He spoke.
He let go of her hand and grabbed a black velvet box out of his pocket. Victoria’s breath hitched in her troth as he revealed a beautiful silver engagement ring with one diamond on the top.
“Ti amo, cariño! And that’s why I’m asking you: Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?” Gabe asked while looking up into Victoria’s eyes.
Victoria’s knees couldn’t take it anymore and she fell on the carpet as they buckled. Tears were streaming down her face.
Gabe was hurt by her reaction, but he pulled her close nonetheless. “I’m sorry, sweetie! I shouldn’t have. Forget I ever said anything. Please, please stop crying.” He whispered while rubbing her back soothingly.
Victoria laughed through her tears and pulled back a little bit to look at Gabe. “Gabe, shut up you idiot! Haven’t you ever heard of tears of joy?” She asked him.
Gabe’s eyes lit up at her words. “So does that mean …?”
Victoria laughed again. “Yes! Yes, off course I’ll marry you. I would love to!” She almost yelled.
Matching smiles covered their faces as Gabe slit the ring on Victoria’s finger. He swept the tears away from her cheeks before pulling her close for a sweet and gentle kiss.
“So, you like it?” Gabe asked while Victoria admired the ring on her finger.
“It’s perfect! Just like you!” Victoria whispered, before kissing Gabe again. This time the kiss wasn’t gentle or sweet, but full of heat and passion.
When they both pulled away for air, Gabe gave Victoria a mischievous look. “How about you go take that shower now, miss soon-to-be-Saporta?” He said in the same husky tone he used earlier.
Victoria laughed as she got up from the bedroom floor. She grabbed Gabe’s hand and pulled him up. She lead the way and they both disappeared in the bathroom, hoping they hadn’t run out of hot water by now.
