As the wind blows[My Chemical Romance Adoption] 107

Rylan-

It's hard to seem that it's only been a few months since we, Kim, Rikki, and I, were adopted. It's hard to seem that it my life, along with theirs, have changed from bad to good in just a matter of months. It's hard to seem that we learned more about our past, our parents, our family, within weeks then the years of the ages. It's just all hard to seem and to imagine. I'm afraid one day I'll just wake up and it will all be gone. I'll wake up and we'll be back in the orphanage with no family, no Gerard, no Frank, no Ray, no Bob, no Mikey. No nothing. It is just all so hard. . . I don't want to wake up.

Going back to the past, it all seems so not real. Kim in the house fire. Rikki almost drowning. Rikki and I getting kidnapped. Our uncle dying in front of our eyes. Old friends coming back into our lives. It seems all to good to be true. It is to good to be true. But it happened and I love everything that has happened. The good and bad.

Thinking about the past, it's amazing to think how we've all changed. Especially us.

I used to be this big rebel. I hated being told what to do. I broke all the rules, stole, smoked a few, partied all night and slept all day. I wasn't a good person until I meet Gerard. Gerard, an angel in disguise. Well, all of them were. I'm still a rebel but I'm not as bad. I follow the rules, don't break the rules and overall, I'm a good kid. I guess I'm a daddy's girl too. I don't know what I would do without Gerard. He's changed me in so many ways and I don't know what I can do to change him.

Rikki used to be a paranoid, bipolar, jumping up and down, skateboarding freak. She is still a skateboarding freak but her attitudes have changed. She's more calm and not as worried. She's more confident about everything she does and she doesn't back down as much as she used to do, which was still not a lot. She still uses her pills but I strongly believe that if she stopped, with Ray to help her, she would be perfectly fine. I'm proud of her. Everything that's happened and how much she doesn't have them effect her. I'm very, very proud. Now, if only she wasn't so strong headed and stopped to think before she does the actions. Many accidents could be stopped.

Kim. I don't know what to say about Kim. Seven months ago, I would have never thought that Kim would be the person I know now. I would have never guessed she would have a boyfriend. I would have never guessed she would be as strong-willed as she is now. I would have never guessed that she would be out there in the fight when she would have normally tired to be the peace maker. Kim was a totally knew girl. I loved it but I would be lying if I said that I didn't miss the Kim I once knew. But I love Kim, no matter who she is.

As a whole, as all three of us, we've grown stronger. We have hope again. We have faith again. Something that we've always needed. The guys, thank god, had given it to us. And I can't thank them enough. Through the good and bad, I couldn't thank them enough.

The videos are all done. Everything is done. Everything was back to the peaceful ways again. Gerard and I were happy with it again. No more worries, no more videos, no more anythings. Mikey and Skyler had moved in together sometime recently meaning something was going on with them. I just had to smile everything I saw them come by. They just were so cute together.

Kim and Frank were out doing things, probably not so dangerous anymore, but fun.

Rikki and Ray were closer than ever since everything and I don't think Ray ever doesn't keep his eyes off of her when they're out and about.

It seemed everything was good and well again, minus Kaden. My days consisted of spending my days by the bedside of him in the hospital. I'm not going to lie to myself anymore. I knew he was dying and he knew it too. I'm not going to give myself false hope and say he's going to be fine. I refuse because I know it's not true. I've shed all the tears I could and now the only thing left was to live his life to the fullest.

“Gerard?”

“Hmmm?”

“I'm going out for a walk.” I replied.

“Oh, okay. Bring your cell phone and be careful.” He said. I could tell he didn't want me to go out but I needed some fresh air and a walk seemed nice.

“I always am.” I said. “I'll be back in a few.”

I headed out on my walk. I was going to meet with Damion in a few hours for dinner and a movie. Until then, I had nothing to do. A walk was fair enough.

The trees were starting to grow leaves as spring came and the chilly winter air was disappearing. In a few months, flowers and rain showers would be here. I couldn't wait.