Bubble, Bubble, Toil & Trouble [2] (Hiei)

Cyn hazily returned to consciousness, not being able to remember why she had fallen asleep in the first place.

'Did a spell backfire or something?' She wondered as she started to stir, her muscles stiff and bones creaking in protest.

As she cracked open her eyes she had to blink a few times. The light confused her. Her home wasn't bright. She'd had to hang thick curtains on all the windows in order to keep up her witchy facade.

Hey wait!

The part of Cyn's brain that seemed to control her memory finally seemed to wake up and filled in the blanks of what had happened earlier that day with avengence.

Sonnuva bitch!

Her eyes shot wide open and she was immediately awake. Her mind quickly took in her surroundings as she angrily looked for the two that had been responsibly for her capture, especially that damn red-head and his stupid, smelly powder of sleepiness!

After looking around the limited area that she could see and finding no one, she realized that she had been propped up in a chair before a seemingly empty desk. She also realized that her hands were bound behind her back which immediately caused panic to start to tickle at the edge of her mind. She couldn't even do the simplest spell with her hands held behind her back. It was like her kryptonite.

'Did those guys know that?' She wondered. Hardly anyone knew of that tiny little flaw the witchy make-up anymore! 'Well a lot of captors tie their victim's hands behind their backs. It's like step one to kidnapping.' Her mind reasoned, trying to calm herself.

'Doesn't matter.' Cyn huffed mentally. She would still find a way out. She may not have been the strongest and stood at a staggering 5'1”, but she had nothing against fighting dirty and wasn't above going for low blows.

She would show them that she was one with which you should not mess with...you know, if she could get her hands untied.

'Who were those guys anyway?' Cyn wondered as the panic started to fade and a calm sort of 'eye of the storm' effect took over. To distract her from the horror of the predicament she was in, her mind instead chose to focus on certain mundane details of the ordeal. After all, if she was going to be kidnapped, she'd at least like to know why and by whom. She couldn't think of anyone she had ticked off recently, she had paid all her taxes and bills, and she was pretty sure she didn't forget a relative when sending out Christmas cards. 'And for that matter, where the heck was she? What kind of kidnapper took their captive to an office?' Cyn wondered, taking another glance around with a frown.

“So you're awake.” She heard a voice say but after glancing around frantically, couldn't locate the person that it had come from, but that wasn't really saying much since from her position in the chair she could only see the empty desk in front of her.

Wait....

Cyn shot the “empty” desk another glance and realized that it wasn't quite as unoccupied as she had originally assumed. It was just that the desk's occupant was exponentially lower than her eyes had originally scanned. A baby was seated in the large chair staring back.

No way!

“That's right. Down here.” The baby said around his pacifier.

Through Cyn's panic she had to wonder if that pacifier made it harder for him to talk, and then the logical side of her brain wondered why the baby could talk in the first place.

Cyn heaved a mental sigh of happiness as her panic and fear started to fade. Now she was sure a potion or spell must have backfired. She was obviously unconscious and having a crazy, potion fume induced dream. And she wasn't sure whether to feel relieved by that or not. While it was better than being kidnapped, breathing magically harmful fumes wasn't exactly the best scenario either. But it was definitely a dream. In her line of business, she had seen quite a few mind boggling, paranormal things...but this was just too weird. She could believe crazy humans wielding flower-smelling, knock out fairy dust, but talking babies? C'mon.

Just as she thought of the red-head from before, she heard someone approach her on the left side and turned to see the red-head in question along with a shorter red-eyed guy that was obviously either a demon or just a very dedicated goth kid. She was leaning towards demon.

On her other side she noticed the slick-back black haired guy along with another guy with vibrant orange hair, who when he saw she was looking at him, shot her a wide smile. She just crossed her eyes and stuck her tongue out in response.

“I'm sorry I had to use the Somnus Pollen, but I'm afraid it was necessary since you wouldn't cooperate.” The red-head from before said, coming to stand next to her chair and looking down at her with an apologetic look that didn't quite reach his eyes.

Cyn regarded him for a moment, still not sure what to make of the human with distinct youki energy (even if she was dreaming). “Well even though this is probably all a dream, on the off chance you're real: suck it!” Cyn snapped, “You should have been raised better if you deem it acceptable to attack innocent women, half your size. But that is a black mark on your divine record so not my problem!”

She saw the man's eyes flash in poorly concealed amusement as if at some inside joke and the demon in the room sniffed with a smirk. “I doubt that mark will make that much of a difference.” The demon commented.

“Plus, he was only doing what I asked him to.” The baby behind the desk said.

Cyn just shook her head with a smile. “I am totally tripping balls right now. No more potion fumes for me.” She said with a sigh, just waiting to wake up.

“I'm sorry to inform you, but you aren't dreaming.” The baby said, folding his hands on the desk in front of him.

“A crazy hallucination would say that.” Cyn said, leaning back in her seat.

The baby just sighed. “Either way, I am Koenma. And the one in charge of regulating the human, demon and spirit world.”

Cyn laughed. “Your not helping your case of not being a trippy dream. And plus the legends say that the Lord of the Worlds is some hulking behemoth called King Enma. So my subconscious, as weird as it obviously is, just added a “ko” to his name. What's next dancing bears?” Cyn said. During all her adventures she had heard a great many myths and legends. Not once had she heard the name “Koenma”.

“King Enma is my father.” Koenma said.

“And who's your mom, Cleopatra?” Cyn scoffed.

The baby scowled at her. “Well I can see that you won't be easily convinced.” He said, then glanced over at someone behind Cyn's chair. “Ogre.”

Cyn was just about to ask what was going on when she felt a sharp pinch on her arm. “Ow! What the hell?!” Cyn screeched. “I will hex you so hard!” She screamed, whipping around before her jaw dropped.

Standing there was a blue ogre, looking apologetically down at her. “Sorry mamn'.”

Finally, Cyn's hysteria caught up to her and bubbled up in her chest and she let loose a loud scream that would have woken the dead.

The occupants of the room waited for her to quit screaming. Yusuke and Kuwabara winced and covered their ears, Koenma and Kurama just waited patiently while Hiei glared at the girl.

“I don't know what you're playing at but I don't buy a thing you've said! This is probably some crazy sex slave ring!” She wailed. “I'll bet you're just a midget with a pacifier!” She ranted, her mind spinning. “You guys are sick but I'll have you know that I have a very powerful family that will be looking for me!”

“No you don't. Your mother's an accountant and your father is a sales clerk at a department store.” Koenma stated, reading from a paper.

Cyn stopped yelling and looked at him as if seeing him for the first time. “How do you know that?” Cyn asked, momentarily struck silent. She'd never told anyone what her parents really did. Every single person that knew her thought her mom was a carnival palm reader and her dad a mysterious Romanian gypsy. In reality, her mom was a stick in the mud who liked knitting and watching Oprah and her dad was a geek with glasses that thought that playing solitaire while watching Myth Busters was a wild and crazy night.

“I believe I already told you that. Being in charge of all three worlds does give me access to all sorts of information.” Koenma said with a shrug. “Now can I get down to why you're here?” He asked.

“Well I do believe that I'm tied up in a chair. That kinda' limits my options a bit.” Cyn said with a casual shrug as if she sat down and got kidnapped by the king of all three worlds every day. If there was one thing that she had learned from working with demons was that acting calm was half the battle.

“It has come to my attention that not only have you been making demons stronger but you have also been creating portals to and from the Makai.” Koenma said.

“Are you asking me to do a job?” Cyn asked incredulously. “You kidnapped me to do a job? Why didn't you make an appointment? Or called? Or sent me a letter? Or e-mailed? I'm a witch with freaking business cards for a reason!”

“No, this is a bit more serious than that. And Yusuke, why didn't you inform her she was under arrest?” Koenma asked, looking over at the guy with the slicked-back hair.

“I tried!” The guy called Yusuke said. “But she went all hocus pocus on me!”

Cyn chuckled and smirked, not even bothering to hide her pride over what she'd done.

“Wait!” Cyn said, finally catching up.”I'm under arrest?!” This was not good! She was too small and pretty to go to jail!

“You can't be too surprised.” Koenma said with a raised eyebrow. “Did you honestly think that letting demons into the human world would be allowed?”

“I dunno'!” 'Cyn said defensively, “I just figured that the king of the worlds had bigger fish to fry like curing cancer or something!”

“A demon in the human world is a very serious matter -”

“So is cancer!” Cyn interrupted.

Koenma scowled. “If humans discover the existence of demons, that could cause mass panic and even put an end to both worlds. And according to this report,” Koenma said looking down at the paper on his desk. “You have let 143 demons into the human world in the last two years.”

“Really?” Cyn asked, a little put out. “I thought it would be more.” After all that hard work, only 143? Bummer.

“That is after subtracting the amount you've sent back to the Makai.” Koenma said, “And I don't think you understand the severity of what you've done.”

“Annnddd~?” Cyn drawled, growing bored as the shock of the entire ordeal was really happening started to wear off and boredom set in. This was turning out to be more of being sent to the principals office than anything really cool.

“What do you mean “and?”?!” Koenma raged. “What you've done could have caused irreparable damage!”

“But it hasn't.” Cyn said nonchalantly. “So what's the big deal?”

“The big deal is that you've broken the law and now you're just going to have to deal with the consequences.” Koenma snapped.

“Then get to it.” Cyn said, leaning back in the chair. Now she was really getting bored. She had been expecting some grand adventure at the beginning but now that she was discovering that she was probably just going to get slapped with some celestial fine and community service, she just wanted to get back home. After all, a girl could only be entertained by the fact that the universe was run by a baby for so long, especially someone that has seen as many weird things as Cyn.

“Weeeellll....” Koenma said, looking sheepish.

“What?” Cyn groaned.

“Well....there really isn't any recent precedent on how to deal with your crimes.” Koenma said, scratching the back of his head. “The last outbreak of witches breaking the law kinda' worked itself out in a.....firey sort of way.”

It took a few seconds but then realization struck Cyn. “Oh no!” Cyn screamed. “You're not going all Salem Witch Trials on me!” She cried, struggling to get out of her chair. She had stayed in school long enough for them to cover the Salem Witch Trials and she hadn't liked what she saw. “I'll turn you into a frog!”

“Calm down. Such methods are no longer used. But it does mean I'll have to come up with your punishment myself.” Koenma assured her.

That only calmed Cyn down slightly. “So......what now?” She asked. “Can't you just slap with some community service and send me on my way?”

Koenma smiled. “Something like that.” He said. “You're going to be charged with repairing everything you've done. All the demons that have been released into the human world must be returned to the Makai. And once you've completed that....Well, we'll think of how to cross that bridge when we reach it. And you're going to have to stay under the surveillance of my Spirit Detectives so they can monitor your progress and make sure you don't try to shirk your duties.”

“So.....you're giving me a baby sitter?” Cyn said incredulously. She was a grown woman....well maybe not “grown” at 16 but she could take care of herself! She had her own home that she'd bought, did everything for herself. She didn't need a group of boys, a weird human-demon red-head, and a full blooded demon breathing down her neck.

“Yeah that's just more work for me!” Yusuke cried in protest and the shorter demon glared at Koenma angrily.

“To answer your question Cynthia, in a way yes, I am giving you a babysitter. But you should have thought of that before you broke the law.” He said, before turning to Yusuke. “And that's the reason it's called a 'job' Yusuke. You have to work.”

“Jobs you get paid.” Yusuke snapped.

Koenma ignored him but then looked over at the ogre. “Ogre. Unlock the girl.”

“About time.” Cyn muttered as the ogre fiddled with something behind her back and she heard something snap open. She brought her arms around to the front, relieved that now she could cast some spells again with arms freed but frowned when she saw that shackles were still attached to her arm.

“I'm leaving the shackles on.” Koenma said to her unasked question. “They will stop you from tapping into any of your abilities unless one of my Spirit Detectives gives the okay first.”

Cyn pouted but wasn't truly surprised. “That sucks.”

“Oh and one more thing,” Koenma said. “You're going to have to stay at a house that I have acquired for this occasion while I have a team remove all the charms from your house and-”

“WHAT?!” Cyn shrieked in indignation and fury. No one, NO ONE, touched the charms on her house but her. It was a rule. It was practically one of the Ten Commandments. “You will not touch those charms!” She hissed.

“Well not me personally of course.” Koenma said, not seeming bothered or threatened by her burst of fury. “But it is necessary. After all, those charms break the rules of living in the Ningenkai.”

“Screw the rules of the Ningenkai! I spent months, almost years, perfecting those charms!” Cyn cried. She didn't really have many friends since her job required some amount of secrecy and she didn't get out much (at least not in the way most girls her age did) so working on those charms had almost taken that place. No one was taking that from her if she could help it. “I labored over those painstakingly! Do you know how much blood, sweat and tears I put into those!? A lot!”

Koenma just shrugged. “My apologies but like I said before, it's necessary. Those charms and wards tap into energy that I can't chance regular humans stumbling upon them, getting hurt, and thus asking questions.”

“People are DUMB! They won't ask questions! They'll blame sunspots and go on their way!” Cyn shouted.

“Dumb?” She heard the demon huff. “I'm not disagreeing you but aren't you a person?”

“Yeah. And like the rest of my species I'm dumb and prone to doing dumb things.” Cyn spat. “I recognize the downfalls of my species just like I recognize the downfalls of yours.”

Hiei raised an eyebrow. “Oh? And what would those be?” He asked, sounding amused with a smirk.

“They tend to think they're much better than they really are. They're haughty and overconfident.” Cyn said with a huff while the demon's smirk fell away to be replaced with a glare. She recognized that she had probably just made an enemy but didn't much care. Wouldn't be the first demon not to like her. Plus, like she said, she was prone to doing dumb things.

Yusuke burst into laughter. “Well sounds like she hit the nail on the head in this case.” He laughed, moving to give Hiei a friendly clap on the back but after a glare from said fire demon, drew his hand back with a chuckle. “You see that in your crystal ball or read it in the cards?” Yusuke asked Cyn laughing.

“No. I read it in the stars while dancing naked under the full moon. Like the rest of witches. Duh.” Cyn shot back sarcastically but actually smiling.

Yusuke threw his head back with a bark of laughter.

“Excuse me!” Koenma barked, bringing the attention back to him.

“Huh?” Cyn asked.

“As I was saying, you Cynthia decide how long this punishment will go on. The sooner you get rid of all the demons, the sooner this is all over.” Koenma said, shuffling around some papers. “And if there are no more questions, Botan will escort you to the house you will all be living in until this is all worked out.”

Cyn just huffed in frustration and stuck her tongue out childishly at the young ruler as a blue haired woman whom she could only assume was “Botan” led her from the room with a chipper smile.

This was going to suck.

Yay! Next part of BBT&T is done! Not quite as good as the first part, but I'm still somewhat satisfied with the final outcome. I tried to make this part at least somewhat interesting even though it is just the explanation chapter.

But wow. I was honestly surprised by the great response I got to the first part of this story! I got more ratings and messages than I did at the starts of both White Noise and Guide To Getting Over Yourself combined! Thank you to all the lovely people that expressed their support. Much love you guys and hope you like this part as much as the first bit.