EvasiveMadeira's profile

{✿--;; my december sun is setting, please stay by me. || 14K metamorphoses~ Thank you!

EvasiveMadeira's Profile Photo
Member since
Mar 28th, 2012
Profile Viewed
15571 Times
Last login:
Aug 15th, 2013

About Me

alice/salomé → 14, girl of many things. and paranoia + depression are amongst some of them. ★ lunaescence: aochikku ; tumblr : brightdowns ; ★ rps: open, message for rules ; ★ trades : open, ask for info ; ★ requests: closed ; ★ thank you for 14K fabulovely views. ♭i don't bite. C: my message box is forever open.



Newest Creations

EvasiveMadeira's Latest Creations
Type Title & Info Average Rating

View all of EvasiveMadeira's stuff

stories мσητ✦яσyαℓε :: нαρργ вιяτнδαγ
Published in Stories on 07/08/2013
5.00
stories ❣『 εη κυsjε мεεя 』gεямαηγ ||
Published in Stories on 07/04/2013
4.75
stories 《 f o r m 》• kamuidesu
Published in Stories on 07/02/2013
5.00
stories { FORM }❤ for edsasukeluva
Published in Stories on 07/02/2013
5.00
stories ① { SWEETS } ❁ sαsuκε uςhιhα
Published in Stories on 07/02/2013
4.50

Friends

Latest Journal Entry

July 11, 2013

☂ *sigh* ⇒ ςlσυδγ sυηshιηε

tw: suicide, self-harm, depression.




listening; llora corazón— yma sumac
watching; n/a
feeling; terrible


✿—;; Thus the wolf said to the sheep, “And I can't stand seeing you so happy.”

Hello guys.

I have a lot to work on right now, both in writing and out of writing.


I have about six trades, four top-priority contest entries, and one, fuckass Luna fic trade.


I mean seriously. How does one expect me to write 1K words in a week and a few days? And a 17 fic about Sebastian Michaelis, too. I'm upset. I bet the person wants it to be smutty (the prompt is ‘One Hell of a Night’, but I titled it The Gorgeous Flowers), but I can't and won't. I'll make it insanely dark instead. It already is, anyway. And my writing style is purposely über-descriptive and Shakespearean/Poe-like. 1K isn't going to write well with minimal description and basic style for me.

And as for my trades, won't you please give me a month or two? I'm very stressed and upset. Everyone in my family hates me more than ever, and my depression is slowly getting worse. I feel like I'm also getting sicker and sicker. I find that I'm eating almost one day, then pigging out the next. Either way, I end up dizzy and ill. People in my family that are present (aunt, grandparents in my father's side, my brother, and my dad soon) are forcing me to eat. My grandparents I know are doing that because they're concerned, but everyone else... I don't know.


I want to go back with my mom and her parents. Whenever I say it's my parents that hate me, it's mainly my dad. My mother's human, so of course she'll lose her temper here and there. At least she apologises whenever she says something hurtful.


I'm so upset. I've been contemplating self-harm, and to tell the truth, I've never done that. So if I'm even thinking of that now, I must've sunk into new lows.


I really don't want to deal with anymore of this. I can't wait 'til my remaining week in Ohio is over. I'll be with the people that—I hope—really love me. I cannot wait.


... Anyway, on the brighter side, I made an RP Quizilla account (a while back, but eh)! It's SunlitBellTower. I actually love to RP, but I'm not open to them right now. I have my hands pretty full. Also I've been watching a lot of Naruto MADs right now, and they're cheering me up. SasoDei is so romantic and sweet! Please tell me I'm not alone with shipping them?


And I've been inspired to draw again, thanks to sophiechan90(?) on Youtube. I secretly stalk her from afar, and I love her art. She's also such a wonderful person. I wish I could be as nice as her.


Anyway, as for my summer reading, I have a bright light shining. One of the books– Night, by Elie Wiesel, is something I'd love to read. If anyone in my new school talks smack about it (or me), I'll beat them up. Can't tolerate those stupid teens anymore, sorry. I know I shouldn't be saying that, but I've withstood them too long, and I can't take it. Won't take it.



... This has been a post. Have a nice evening, and sleep well!

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Jul 22nd, 2014

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