Lokey's profile
Suicide Is The Proof Of Life.
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Latest Journal Entry
November 23, 2005
~*Vision, Malevolent, Pressence?*~
OK, this is another odd occurrence of mine. i was lying in bed tonight, when all of a sudden i felt light headed so i lied back, i heard a female voice, that at first i assumed was mine own talking to me, in my thoughts? i then felt this odd stir in my head and when i tried to move, i couldn't, i just felt a strange throb in my whole body. I'm really not sure what happen but i know i was awake and I'm sure it happened, i don't remember what we talked about but it was a sad conversation that included the words "death, why, alone" more then once, she just rambled on about nothing really. at first i thought i was just talking to myself inside my head, yes I'm crazy i talk to myself, but back to the point, she was asking me odd things like "why do i go on?" & "why was i thinking about that?" i had no real answer that i can recall, i just listened and told myself over and over again "this IS happening!!" I've always thought there was a "strange" energy in my closet, its a walk in closet by the way, and when i woke up the fabric poster of Ed Elric i hung, not 2 days ago in front of my closet was knocked down off the hook like something pushed it aside. she/it/whatever wasn't a scary presence just sad, I'm not a very sad person, I'm bipolar, yes, but I've taken on the "i don't give a fuck" attitude so life really doesn't bother me anymore, but this presence was completely engulfed in grief, she was so lonely and sad, remorseful too. i had odd pictures in my head as she spoke, mostly glimpses of things thats went by so fast i barley saw any of it. she was not scary at all just very lonely and sad.I've had things like this happen before.
when i was living in my old house in Maryland, i had found some of my grandmothers jewelery in my closet so i took it out and just through the heap of knotted up necklaces on my bed, i went to take a shower and when i came back in they were all neatly lied out on my bed, my door was locked so no one could have gotten in. not scary just odd, and so something my grandma would do she was a neat freak.
my mom and i have both had this happen in our old house. in the middle of the night i would wake up and hear old swing music playing from the right corner of my room, it sounded like it was coming from the basement. so being the fearless educated women i am i would search the basement for a reasonable explanation for the music, as soon as I'd go down stairs the music would stop. well i figured that maybe a cat or something had hit an old radio and it had played the music, but i searched the HUGE damp basement and found nothing,and it only happens it that one room too, just my old bedroom.
this one happens to my mom in her room in the house we have now. she be asleep and feel a presence in her room, but the thing is when this thing comes it scares her so bad she can't move, she says she can barley breathe when she feels it near, it just sucks all the life out of the room, she says she will lay there in her bed not moving for hours wide awake and sometimes it scares her so bad she just cries, but she does it soundlessly, she says that when it comes she just wants to be as still as she can, she thought about running through her door one time, but she couldn't move she thought if she were to move or even make a sound it would do something to her, now heres the really odd part she says that on the far left corner of her room a door appears, and a bright light shines through to the other side, first off there is no door there in her room. sometimes the door stays closed and thats a good thing i guess, she thinks so because if the door opens she just sits there and stares off at it till the sun rises, and then when the sun comes up she feels safe again.
awhile ago this happen to me, i was sleeping when i felt like something very wrong was happening, like something was watching me and was very very mad. strange sounds would come from my bathroom, as if things were being moved. i would be so scared at this point that I'd just lay in my bed and try not to move or breathe to much, i wouldn't even open my eyes for fear of what it would do to me if i saw it. then I'd hear something moving around my room, like someone was walking around my bed repeatedly watching me lay there terrified, i could feel it stare at me like the fact i was hoping that i died just to get away from it made it very happy. the thing is malevolent. sooner or later I'd just black out and when I'd wake up I'd go to my bathroom to see if anything was displaced and nothing was touched.
now let me reassure you that i am not easy to scary, surprise, startle i am very calm and some say "cold hearted", so all in all i really don't have many emotions i show and i don't fear anything but these things I've written about. i had these things happen all through out my childhood too, but now its happening more often and stronger than ever, its not just the scary ones, its the overwhelming sad ones too, i mean i just wanted some input on this. being the night person that i am i sleep all day and am up all night, these things only happen at night. do these things happen to anyone else? can i make it stop?
Daily Horoscope
May 26th, 2012
Read Full HoroscopeCapricorn
You are either going to have a brush with fame or find yourself treated like a rock star yourself. Either way, it's going to be sweet -- so enjoy the attention and the positive energy!
