RyomaPaola's Journal

August 24, 2008

Have you ever...

Have you ever tried to solve the problem...
But eventually become the problem?
Have you ever tried to destroy the fiend
But in the end, you become the actual monster?
Have you tried to show atleast one of your skills
But at the end, you become so humiliated that you can't face anyone anymore?
Have you tried to defeat an obstacle
Then, become the obstacle yourself?
Have you every tried to be yourself
And in the end you wish you didn't even try being 'you'?
Have you ever tried to atleast help
But in the end, you become the hindrance?

In the end, become the eye sore?

Become someone or something you wish you weren't?

Did you ever wish that?

If so...
I also feel the same.
What a coincidence.
We both feel the same.
So don't worry...
Alot of people are feeling that constantly...
I, myself, am not excluded.
So don't ever think that you alone:)
Cause you aren't alone...

posted at 8:58 am EDT | 0 comments

July 10, 2008

RANT

Forgive me
But this is a rant:
Nooooooo! i'm completely hopeless! I dont hav a decent I.D.! It's so annoying! T_T alam nyo rin bah n ang I.D. pic qoeh dis year is a
DUN DUN DUN
....................
"DRUG ADDICT"
Yes! Drug addict! It's really pissing me off.
I mean, me, a drug addict.
What did I do to deserve this much humiliation?
I mean, I haven't lied-unless necessary-
What have I done to actually deserve this "DRUG ADDICT" look. I even look like FPJ doing his "ISANG BALA KA LANG POSE"! I really hate, detest, despise and loath "my" I.D.
What is that all?
No.
No. no.
My rant has a part two.
No, duh. It'll be too short if I only put "that" in.
Dotcha think?
My second rant is about the god forsaken P.E. uniforms.
We, the three guadalupe, was instructed to wear our P.E. uniforms before coming to school.
I, Paola Bianca, was again the earliest in the pack.
Coming to school early, I received vicious glances from gradeschoolers and some 1st years.
I also whole-heartedly received scary glares from second years, fourth years and co-third years.
Yes, of course. I being the earliest to come to school in P.E. uniform was mistaken for a homicidal maniac.
From the looks of people, they think I was an alien from another planet who had just mistakenly landed on their premises.
It, my dilemma, was scary-for how many people glared at me as if they were gonna rip me to shreds- was actually over in 5 to 6 minutes.
Alas! My knights in shinning armors had arrived.
Atlast, the reign of doom and destruction was over.
Chaos and isolation was gone-somehow-.
And I was no longer a menace to society. For we were now to.
And as time and time passed, another classmate came. And sanity was present, atlast.
And to protest about the injustice we were treated-the scary glares were the first- we, 8 of us, all went to the canteen. Of course.
Our attire was the "P.E. Uniform".
As we rallied through the vast path to the canteen we passed through the other 3rd year students who were wearing the normal school uniform.
Someone asked "Bakit kyo nki P.E.'ing lahat?" The question was too complex to answer so I answered "Xmpre eh. Meron kming anti-school uniform movement." as funny as I sounded, that's what it looked like. Also, Charis, my classmate also replied "Wla kc kming pasok eh." LMAO. That was funny.
And after we protested and gave other students a piece of our minds, our situation redirected to our whereabouts. Of course, what were we to do at the canteen?
Finding something reasonable to do-which was to buy tape measure for our P.E. (first class: P.E.)- we displayed our uniforms with heads help up high.
After all the stressing things we had to worry about.
We returned to the classroom. We had the morning praise and S.M.A.R.T.(stop moving and read thoughtfully) So far everything was normal-except for the fact that we wore our P.E. uniforms before coming to school... That was until...
DUN! DUN! DUN!
until mrs. soliman announced that the wearing of "P.E. uniforms on P.E. day" was....
NOT YET APPROVED! :O
erm... yes... a shocker isn't it?
Yet, we were told to wear it yesterday. @_@

posted at 6:58 am EDT

June 25, 2008

is there a point in my existence?

Due to my total lack of sanity and inability to do anything

I will be unable to write.

For my thinking skills are non existent at the moment.

I feel very stupid at the moment.

I'm starting to question the meaning of my existence.

What is the point in my mere existence?

Is there really a point to my life?

Where do I stand?

What role am I to play in this vast universe?

Am I just a bug in society, consuming repetitively like any normal human would do?

Do I stand here just for the fact of being here?

Am I merely paraphernalia?

Am I just for decoration?

To flatter those who need to be pleased?

What am I a mere hedonist?

That only seeks pleasure for one’s self.

This lies as an unsolved mystery for me.

I often think it’s imprudent to leave questions unanswered.

But, this one is too vast and vague.

And as human beings, I fear to conquer or to even encounter this vague things.

That only an omniscient person or creature can answer.

It may seem hard to masticate everything.

But soon, I will find out reasons.

Soon, I will find answers to what is left behind.

Soon, I shall end the never ending questions that lie beneath.

Soon, I’ll solve my dilemma.

Soon, I’ll find out…

Why do I exist?

Hopefully, I’ll understand by that time the truth.

And be able to answer this erudite dilemma of mine.

I hope by that time, serendipity will be with me.

I hope although multifarious questions come to my mind, I’ll be able to solve them all vividly.

But if you have found yours, please share how you figured out your meaning.

Who knows the path you might have taken might be the same path I'll travel through later on.

posted at 6:50 am EDT | 0 comments

May 26, 2008

Updates

so sorry guys I might not be updating soon, or soon enough.

It is because I have currently been out of ideas and I want to atleast, improve my writing skills. That is if I have any.

And I think I should add more detail and I think I should beautify my stories.

I think with my skills now I won't achieve such, I think I should make stories that people can relate to (which I have not done).

To be honest all my stories and creations are spur of the moment so I think none of them are actually a total success. I think most of them are very messy and somehow some lines, quotations and events are inappropriate for the character's personality. I also think my characters are going to become toopredictable or just plain bipolar.

I think I should analyzesituations more as if my life depended on it, rather than just plain writing something for just having something to write or just plain writing just to keep up the updates.

I have lots on my mind so, sorry I think I won't be updating soon.

posted at 6:04 am EDT

May 26, 2008

currently pissed

I am currently pissed today.

I mean it's because of my grandma.

Yep. My grandma.

And yes. "She's old, just ignore her." line doesn't work for me anymore.

I mean it's seriously pissing me of.

Everytime, I surf the net she tells me to clean/wash the dishes, sweep the house floor and do this do that.

It's very annoying! I mean she does it everytime I'm surfin the net having fun.

And yes, I'm aware of the "She's the mom of your mom, so without her you would never be born." phrase.

But, I found out the truth that she shows that she cares to become the Oh-so-good grandma in the story, the life-savior that rescues the day and saves the whole wide universe from aliens and all that .

The truth is she's all doing this for "superficiality". Meaning she does want to look good and be called the greatest, most caring and helpful grandma of the whole wide universe.

I maybe making a big commotion over noting, being pissed and annoyed for absolutely nothing.

But for me, this is something.

This is something to talk about.

This is a big issue for me.

This is hard to digest for me.

This is something to rant about,

Something to put heart into,

Something to say what I feel.

I have to...

I need to...

I just don't want to say this.

I need to....

Erm... I mean write this...

Superficiality is the act of being superficial or the act of looking good, but being very shallow.

Yes. Shallow. Why?

Because she's making a great big deal out of nothing.

I mean it was about television!

She asked me what time "witch Yoo hee" was and I answered.

It's on now.

But when she saw "Ms. Yoo Hee" she like went

"Why didn't you tell me it's already Witch yoo hee?!"

in a very pissed voice that caused me to be annoyed.

I told her.

I did.

But she didn't listen.

That was clearly her fault.

But she had to blame me.

And, she had been picking on me.

She said I shouldn't surf the net for so long.

But what could I do? I was just a kid.

A kid enjoying summer break.

She was asleep and the T.V. was on.

And she when she woke up, she blamed me why didn't I turn off the T.V.

Lastly, she was sleeping but when she woke up she lied and said she was watching T.V. and said her

eyes were red because she watched T.V., but truth was her eyes were red because she was asleep....

posted at 5:48 am EDT | 0 comments

May 21, 2008

My stories...

Herearesomeinformationaboutmystories:

KEEPYOURHEADINTHEMISSION
Theromeo:UchihaSasukeorHyuugaNeji.
Thejuliet:MizuAshiya.
Nickname:Ash,Ashi,Ashiya
Summary:YoungestAkatsukimember,MizuAshiya,istaskedtogotoKonohatogatherinformationupontheKyuubi'shost,UzumakiNaruto...AshiyabecomespartofTeam7,thatconsistsofUzumakiNaruto,HarunoSakuraandUchihaSasuke...Caughtupinherlies,shehastobattlethetwolegendarysannins,theHokage-Tsunade,Jiraiya...WillshemakeitoutofKonohaalive?Willsherealizethatsomeonelovesher?
Willsheeverturngood?
Chapters:7
Funnything:Itmayseemironicbutherlastnamemeanswater,althoughherelementisfire.

*geek*
Romeo:UchihaSasuke
Juliet:NaraAkira
Chapters:3

Seasonsoflove
Romeo:Narutoorsasuke
Juliet:TorekaAi

Timeshavepassed
Romeo:UchihaSasuke
Juliet:HyuugaKagame


posted at 2:17 am EDT

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