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April 24, 2011
Like you, you can refuse
I'm not lucky to be your belovedcvfhsgdd woman, at least I can refuse you, make you miss life.- InscriptionLuoxiao Chen, are you?
Today Han Wen I visited bookstorescvfhsgdd and see a lot of blog in the form of books, I feel a lot of fun, a long time ago, I wrote a diary, and later, I gave you the diary.
Read those books, I thought for a long time ago, we do.
Eyebrows like caterpillars
Six years old, I noticed you.
We all live in the family unit of father and mother compound, summer nights, old people like to enjoy the shade under the willow, often with my grandmother back in, after you follow my grandmother, we chat with the practice of sharing a room filled with pickles.
You know?You speak, wrinkled brows together as whispering about caterpillars.
Seven years old when I read in first grade school children, you old than me, has read the third grade.Your not tall, sitting in the second row of the classroom, my child is not high, sitting in the first row of the classroom.
The first look at open-air movies, but also in the compound, "Waterloo Bridge" and "a tiger by", I went early, sat in the crowd shouted Hurry up, hurry up, or watching a movie by others, we did notof, as if the film is a tasty cake, the same can eat into the stomach."Waterloo Bridge" We did not understand, you do not take a fight, boring.
Fifteen years old, you are admitted to the third of our high school here.At first, I thought you test pretty well, and then I, our little high school here, the former two are the focus, you admitted to the third.You live in the school, we rarely see each other.
Meet again, I have the first high school graduate, admitted to the University of Shanghai, you read the college, has graduated.I met your girlfriend, you love the three months to break up.You say she is your woman picked up in the street, you told a joke, she told you to go.Then a handsome than you, than you have the money man blinked, do not have to tell jokes, and she jumped out to cast dark.I laughed, I feel you still like it used to be interesting.Say goodbye to you in time, you pop up a "little words, you like, like ... ... grown up."
I am sorry, three
Yes ah, I grew up.Year-old girl becomes necessary to graduate students.You grow up, eyebrows wrinkled like a caterpillar into a social freshman boys.
You have spoken in love twice, the first people you do not, the second is people do not want you.I have always been a person.I am a person because I like you, I grew to like you.I never denied, nor embarrassed.Originally, I was shy and introverted girl, is you I am transformed into a mud Bi outgoing woman.I have short hair, I think this war when you play I would call, and later found the girl you like long hair, I had long hair again.
The whole world know I love you, even my grandmother and your grandmother is no exception, they said I come home every year are asking for your message, and sometimes the phone is still asking, not at all reserved.At that time your grandmother always invited me to your house to play, I often go to your room, you learn that the machine building, the house there are many car models, or a mess on the floor.You are trying hard to learn English, I was a student of English major, volunteered to help you, my grandmother such a good girl, why do not you chase CNR?My face turned to red.You are without any reaction.
I was a little unhappy, that you may not care so much about me, learn English, and some absent-minded.Grandma call a meal, we walked together to the dining room, accidentally bump into each other, you say; i am sorry. I said i am sorry, too. You say i am sorry, three. Are you on purpose, I laughed.
The table below, you hold my hand, your hand so much, so warm, you as many times a child holding me and said to run a little faster, now you hold my hand, I think you would be willing to, then on, each the same season, in the same way, and go with me?
We love.The first time you kissed my lips, I have no experience, mouth closed tight.I later read back to school last semester, you on the class, I call you every day, you said a lot of the company's beautiful, very seductive.May, I flew back from school to see you, air tickets to spend half of my work-study program savings, your busy with work, not to the airport to pick me up, I went directly to your company, such as in front of you, to youWhen calling, you say, ah, you really come back.I thought you were joking na, also joked that I work overtime.
"So where are you?" You said you and your friends together.I went to KTV to see you, you and a female colleague chorus "Shenqingxiangyong."Colleagues ask you who I am, you say little sister, grew up with the yard.So angry when I go home, but you get drunk, I can not vent.
Who alone saw the banyan
Three days later, I returned to school, no money to travel by plane, took the train, you sent me to the station, I said in conversation to QQ, you say good, but as I have been lit QQ.
I looked everywhere to find a job send your resume, nose, can be wiped on the wall of gray, and sad when a person secretly crying.Want to talk to you, you always too busy, suddenly found that, all along, is my own initiative, in fact, how you do not care about me.
There is a translation company in Shanghai, want me, I refused.I want to return to town, it is our city.Only in the small town, really small jobs.Later, my mother helped me find a job, it is generally work, they said I was Fudan students, some wronged me, my mother some hesitation, "little, I really do not know you spend so much worth."
First day of work, and said good to celebrate with you, but you lose some.Awareness in fitness centers around you go girl butcher food.The sky falling snow, the highway closed the road, you leave those winding paths, a borrowed car in the snow in the open for five hours, and finally to the girl's home.You do not know how much I worry that you will have an accident, come back, you told me to eat really good food feminist.
I am angry, I fear that you are not afraid of it?You head down, do not speak.Day in the snow is gone way too long, the reasons for it, you have a cold, an intravenous drip in the hospital bed.I boil the bones of your favorite soup fans to see you.You play games in bed, I wash your dirty clothes, the drying bed in the ward, you look at those clothes, saying little, thank you.Your eyes a little red, my eyes are red.
We have and better.
Mid-Autumn Festival, you tell me the company has a chance to be stationed in the field, is to go to Shanghai, you yearn for the job has been a long time.You know?I'm so happy, I think, if you go to Shanghai, I can go with you, I'm excited to tell you the idea.You silent child said, all right.
Only one month, you told me that the company did not send you to Shanghai, they sent another person, you change thecvfhsgdd plan to Xining.I say you do not fight for it?I was joking.I think you go to Xining, I can go with you.When you are a true original in the play computer games, holding AK-47 suddenly left andcvfhsgdd right, went Flesh, you take the initiative to put the game what ah say?Really boring, I went to the field is like a man some time, because I'm afraid to go with you and only give up, to apply to go to Xining.
I froze.Why do you ask, do not want and would rather go to Xining together?You are always together, will gradually tired, meaningless, we can love on the phone and live independent lives.You say I'm sorry.Little, give me two years ... ... the window was open, the wind gently raised, the house has huge banyan tree pot, green palm leaves love like begging.When I first love, you said you like banyan, I go bird market, it moved back to the fourth floor of a person's home, on the corner position.Every day, a banyan tree watering is my banyan sick, wearing masks to spray fertilizer it is me, you occasionally through, saw, hand touch, even the beautiful is not willing to say, now you want togo to Xining, you want to go alone, do not take me, of course, will not take it, I know you love me, and like a pot of banyan what is the difference.
I see how hard I have no mess, you are my feelings, like the banyan tree is always less than love.With you, you will be very happy, and I will be very painful.
Than miss
Autumn has come, the company's plans change, your trip to Xining to shorten from two years to three months.
On this news, I do not know in front of you, the performance of the happy or sad.After you leave, I can help your mom and dad to do whatever things that separates call you to tell they were great.
About things, wrote this diary only, and not continue.I do not write things like this -
Your day in Xining, I have been good to you.You come back from Xining, I did not pick you up, a call, I do not pick, I mean to you and alienated.
Contact me to that house translation company, going to Shanghai to work, do not tell you, you know from where my parents the news, I have at the airport.
You chase and asked why.
When I say school, I should go, so long delayed, now is the time.You asked me not to punish you, that you properly in Xining, nothing to do, you want me to stay, you treat me right, we start again.
I laughed, lost time, even if not love, people will stay.I gave you my diary, I'm the first person to write the second person you, the above bit by bit, all on the diary, read what we were young: I lookout for you; together to find teachers for seats;I visited you robbing the nest site after the first girl to accompany you to see who the first open-air film; our first kiss, the first and last quarrel; there alone basin of the banyan tree, fromto no one that fertilization of the ... ...
In the diary of the last page, I read: Perhaps you've forgotten, today is our one year anniversary, a year ago you said I love you, 521 plus 365, the results on the 886.So let us this day 886, Luoxiao Chen.
I smiled, turned and calmly through security to see you again.I think you may be reading my diary, maybe not.I remember the moment I refuse you, your eyes filled with apprehension and loss, I did not tell you, break up, I treat you, you will regret robbery; the diary for you, you will know there isThere is nothing I love your woman, and only now, you lost me.
I did not tell you the news at the airport, I let my parents tell you, I want you to the airport, want you to look at me to leave, so you'll always remember me.
Each man's life there are two women, one for the occasional miss, one for love, daily necessities for life.I know you will never lovecvfhsgddme, then, you will encounter a beloved woman, you love her, just like I love you.I'm not lucky enough to be your favorite, at least you can refuse to let you miss life.So, I chose such a break.
