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shakemeup's profile
believe it.
- Member since
- Feb 20th, 2008
- Profile Viewed
- 51 Times
- Last login:
- Sep 14th, 2008
About Me
i'm tay, and i strongly dislike this new quizilla thing.
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Latest Journal Entry
March 11, 2008
dont be mean james dean.
my hair is wavy like the beach that i miss so much and i cant tire of running my hands through it because in 4 days it will all be gone. well, not all of it, but most of it. 10 inches of it, to be exact but who wants to be exact? itll feel like all of it and im worried ill look so bad with short hair but im donating and blah blah blah iogfivndkfhhas!im so so so sick of
well im not sure what im sick of but there must be something to put me in this mood so why dont you fill in the blank? last night i baked chocolate cupcakes with raindbow icing and they're delicious but all ive had to eat today is a cupcake and some dry captain crunch because im just not hungry and i think ill have another cupcake.
did i mention i made them from scratch? im so proud of myself, its terrible. in 14 days, 2 weeks!, p@td's new cd is coming out and i am EXCITED because, well just because, and i get to see them in may with motion city soundtrack and the hush sound and does anyone know what phantom planet sounds like because they're there too. YAY! i used the right theres, i think. I have an urge to go outside and lie in the grass but there is no grass to lie in and i dont hae snowpants and i dont want to get my butt wet so i guess im not gunna lie in the snow either.
they make us do these typing tests at school in business class to see how fast we can type properly but you have to re read something and type it and here i am just typing my thoughts and thats so much faster an i guess they're just rushing out of me like water from a broken damn but not the right words. never the right words.
i think im depressed? or something close but ill never say it out loud and im hoping im just pmsing, but pms doesnt run year round everyday so maybe not. i told my mom i couldnt sleep so she said 'thats because you dont think you can sleep, just pretend to sleep, or count sheep or something' but i tried that and sheep give me headaches and of course i dont think i can sleep, i havent slept well since 7th grade! and now she has a new plan to fix it, shes going to wake me up everyday at 8am so im tired enough to sleep at night and maybe im glad she wont just get me sleeping pills like normal people because then im scared i might use them to sleep for longer than what is defined as sleeping, and what is possibly defined as the good sleep.
do you have those thoughts? this morning in the shower the water replaced my tears and i thought of all the ways i could off myself and how many fast acting tylenol it would take but i didnt sop are you proud of me now mom? no, you never were. you're such a good actress though, really, you could be famous if it wasnt for us. you sure do party enough. but would you mind putting something normal in your morning coffee? at leats buy some baileys or something. i cant imagine red wine and coffee being to terribly delicious.
why is our family full of substance abusers, mom? and am i next? is that why you wont just give me sleeping pills? why is my favourite uncle addicted to crack again, and why does my other uncle always slurr his words? auntie L seems fine, but she's no nervous. what happened to her? and why dont you like auntie C? she's your sister after all.
are there any happy families out there? or did that only happen in the 60's movies? im tired of asking questions i dont want answers to, and i never got that cupcake.
off i go.
